azieazam

DON'T QUIT

2011-01-04T16:19:00.002+08:00

when things go wrong

as they sometimes will,

when the road you're trudging

seems all uphill,

when the funds are low

and the debts are high,

and you want to smile,

but you have to sigh,

when care is pressing you down a bit -

REST IF YOU MUST,

BUT DON'T YOU QUIT.

success is failure

turned inside out,

the silver tint of

the clouds of doubt,

and you can never can tell

how close you are,

it may be near when

it seems a far.

so, stick to the fight

when you're hardest hit -

IT'S WHEN THINGS GO WRONG

THAT YOU MUSTN'T QUIT.

this is written on the cover of my notebook.. it's am's actually, i like it very much, it gave me fresh new spirit every time i feel low.. i'm sharing it, manalah tau it work on others too..

me a mother..

2010-12-30T15:19:00.004+08:00

as i promised, and lina is taking her afternoon nap.. here goes..

i was due on 1st nov 2009, but i've been so eager to have an early labour, because i am impatient.. haha.. but that didn't happened.. in fact, i was 4 days late.. why? because i chose to sleep..

my water broke on saturday 1st nov,as predicted by the doctors, at around 3am.. but it wasn't much, i thought i might be imagining it, so i went back to sleep.. i didn't tell anyone on this, but i do find that whenever i urinate there's a gush of water coming out, that i cannot control it, i asked my sister on this and she told me that water broke is different from urinating, that's probably just my baby crushing my bladder, ok.. on monday, i called my mother having normal conversation and i casually told her about the water broke incident, she freaked out a bit, saying that i should have gone to the hospital, but since it was already late in the evening, being lazy, i said ok i'll go.. but then, the next day i didn't go yet, i still feel the rushing water during urinating, no pain no nothing.. she's moving actively.. i told my MIL but it was then too late in the evening, hehe.. so kite pegi esok ajela.. rabu pagi, i went to Klinik Kesihatan, they urged me to go the hospital immediately, i started to feel a bit panick, but only went to Regency around 3pm, am baru start keje tempat baru, luckily his bos is very understanding, he let him went home early, and lucky again, Regency is just in front of his new office, so we met him there..

sampai2 Regency, Dr. Thokha scanned and told me that "air mentuban dah sikit ni, uri dah rosak, i should have given birth days before.." then only it struck me that my stupidity could have cost me my baby's life.. stupid azi, tido je ko ea.. buruk perangai.. Alhamdulillah, nothing worst happened, the baby is still perfectly healthy, but i have to give birth today, induce la jawapannya..

lutut aku dah tak ada rasa, hati dah kembang tak kuncup2.. Dr. Thokha pecahkan air mentuban yang berbaki itu, dan pasang drip kat tangan, i cannot even stand anymore, takut macam tak bleh describe, apa la jadi kat aku pas ni.. penyakit nervous aku pun muncul dan haa apa lagi, BP naik tinggi gile tak bleh turun2, sebab jantung aku tgh lumba Iron Man..

aku terus masuk labour room, i started to feel contraction around 5pm, mula2 gua steady beb, lama2 hangit.. am memang ada, tapi tengok muka dia macam nak hentam, belakang dah macam putus dua, tapi aku memang ingat pesan MIL aku, jangan nangis zi.. nanti tak ada tenaga nak teran, ok baby.. ibu caiyok!!

at around 10pm, aku mcm dah tak bape nak bleh handle, nurse selok2 dia kata dah 7cm, kelam kabut pasang segala mende, aku mcam dah relieved sket sebab oke la tak lama sangat nak sakit, heh.. semua itu dusta belaka, Dr. Thokha datang check kata baru 3, BARU 3 OK!!! not even halfway... semua positive energy sudah mula evaporate, dia kata aku akan bersalin dalam around 3am, tak pikir banyak aku resort to amek pain killer, dia kata you still feel the pain, but u can relax.. and he's DAMN RIGHT..

sakit tak ada kata bleh describe, but i fall asleep between contraction, not a deep sleep, mcm khayal gitu, my mother arrived from Kuantan around 11pm dan bermula la episod yang jadi modal am gelakkan aku sampai skrg, gelak la ko, aku humban dalam longkang, tapi dia gelak jugak.. aku panggil mak aku suh ajar breathing every time contraction, every time, dgn nada yang sedih dan sayu (to him its hillarious), mak aku pun gelak.. jadi mungkin aku je yang sayu.. mak aku tak kira suh tarik nafas aku tend to kelam kabut, aku lebih tenang dengar suara mak, kakak ku jeles sebab tak penah mak sempat masuk labour room dia, itu adalah masalah ko... ahaha..

contraction aku selang 3 minutes, dari awal lagi pun memang gitu, so not much rest.. i could not describe how the pain is, but i can still remember how i feel that moment, i remember ternampak sekilas lalu David Letterman kat tv depan katil (apa guna tv tu? haa ko gtau aku) so aku tau baru midnite, lama lagi nak 3am.. air selusuh dah minum, bubur mcd juga dah abes, (ye orang tunggu aku sambil makan mcd), cepat laa baby ibu carik jalan keluar..

true to his word, memang pukul 3 head dah engorged.. mak aku yang nampak, panggil nurse.. dia kata Dr. otw dari rumah, takpe rumah dia dekat je.. waklu otw... ehehehe.. am juga nampak kepala dah nak kuar.. berani am, ada orang takut, seb baik dia berani, lagipun aku dah ugut dia suh tengok no matter what... eh mana Dr. ni, lambat la plak.. aku siap2 dah marah2 mana tak sampai2, nurse suh turun kaki, kepit.. kepit apa lagi, aku dah terberanak sangat ni.. dia kata jangan teran lagi, cakap senang laa.. aku teran jugak sket2..

akhirnya kelibat Dr. muncul juga, dia bleh nak bagi ceramah plak dulu, dia kata jangan risau sakitnya 45min je, 45min?? abes yang dari pukul 5 tadi apa? gurau2? ehehehe.. masa itu je aku emo.. dia tak abes cakap sangat aku terus teran, dan alhamdulillah, 3 kali je lina dah kuar.. leganya hanya Allah yang tahu, dia angkat lina dan cakap, IT'S A GIRL.. and how she cried..

dunia aku macam sunyi sepi bila dia letak anak aku atas dada aku.. macam2 perasaan timbul.. my first word to her is Assalamualaikum anak ibu.. then, Hi.. she's so licin, penuh vermix lagi, terus BF.. dan sampai sekarang juga lina masih BF.. alhamdulillah..

she was born at 4th November 2009, at 3.15am.. weight 3.17kg..

and i was officially a mother, and very proud to be one..

oh ya, my mother, my MIL, and my beloved am witnessed it.. meriah kan, lantak laa tak kira dah masa sakit, sape nak tengok, tengok.. ehehee

salam

2010-12-29T21:24:00.002+08:00

assalamualaikum to all...

whoaa, its been so long i thought i closed this blog forever.. but then i decided not to.. i love sharing even more now that i have soooo much to tell, im a mother now, and like all mothers.. i will be writing a lot about farah lina, my now already one year old daughter.. life has been pretty much very different now than it was before lina is born.. not only we have her around which are extremely wonderful experiences day by day, i am also now no longer a career lady i was before.. yes, i am now a full time housewife and loving it to the bits.. eventhough i was scared at first...

i was officially unemployed Jan this year, my company's rough days don't seem to end.. so they're letting go of their employees, and both me and my husband were among the "lucky" ones selected for vss, my husband went first and i followed him two months later, but i didn't actually go to work during the last 2 months, because.. i had a baby.. lina has arrived..

i very much wanted to share my labour experience but i have to do it in the next post, being a full time mother, i have to be very efficient on time management too since lina is demanding a lot of together play time, and i hated to frustrate her by saying "no, ibu has work to do", and now is the time she wanted me, to help her stacking up her lego bricks.. i hope that i will be writing again tomorrow, because now that i'd started, i feel like i missed doing this..

i'll tell you what happened the day lina was born tomorrow,till then..

adios,

xoxo

peti telebisyen

2009-10-14T15:05:00.003+08:00

helo hula aloha!!!

hari ni aku ingin membantu seorang teman..

dia menjual peti telebisyen LCD baru berjenama Samsung.. bape inch lu mau?

harga saya tidak diberitahu, TAPI... dah sah la BOMBASTIC prices!!

kalau tak aku tak nak tolong dia sebab nanti aku kena kutuk sekali...

price neg dan keoriginalan TV tersebut adalah digerenti oleh persatuan peti telebisyen kg buah pala... ehehe.. sensitif tu.. sebab kg tu dah jadik sejarah... hehee..

im not sure qty dia limited ke tak, tapi kalau nak tanya la saya cepat².. manala tau jap² lagi aku dah nak bersalin ke.. ehehehe (tolong amin ramai² cepat!!)

itu je laa, nak cite apa lagi.. pinggang aku sakit ni.. meh meh beli tv..

adios,
xoxoxoxo

bila?

2009-10-13T12:32:00.003+08:00

salam everyone...

pergh lama seh tak update, tapi lagi lama yang hari tu... aku tengok orang lain, cukup excited mengupdet pasal their pregnancy's status and experiences.. tapi aku.. ehehhee..

bukan tak excited nyah, aku rasa nak buat cam gugu gaga erra tu haa, keadaan dan masa tak berapa nak mengizinkan.. aku upload aje la gmbar sket2, sebab sket pun yang ada.. satu hari raya ritu pun sekeping gamba pun tak ada aku ngan laki aku... betapa sebok nye laa nyah oiii mak beraya..

alhamdulillah, segala puji, rahmat dan syukur kepada Allah, aku dah masuk minggu ke 37, tak kira la ticker tu nak cakap bape sekali pun, aku tukar ticker hari tu pun sebab yang lama tu macam nak suruh aku mengandung style gajah, bertahun2.. aku tengok makin lama dia makin tambah plak masa aku nak kena tunggu... memang silap besar laa ngkau, aku ni memang tak sabo orangnye...

masuk minggu ke 37, macam2 sakit aku rasa, tapi satu pun tak ada yang lead to labour.. apa cer? ohh baby, ibu ko ni tak sabo... memang aku bukan jenis penyabar.. am je yang ada sifat terpuji ni.. semoga jangkit laa kat anak aku nanti..amin.. tapi deep down inside, aku akan tunggu sampai puteri kesayangan ini.. bersedia untuk keluar dengan sendirinye... (dah memang kena tunggu kan, kasik sedap hati laa sket, konon cam redha) eh aku dah gtau ea apakah jantina nye... insyaAllah.. perempuan la anak sulung bertuah hasil bunting pelamin aku dan am...

nama? gua dah standby beb.. jangan nanti korang tak puas hati sudah... eheheeheh

aku pohon sangat2, semoga di saat aku melahirkan nanti.. biarlah am ada dengan aku.. dalam labour room tu, walaupun aku rasa ada kemungkinan dia akan seribu kali lebih panik dah berpeluh sakan dari aku, tapi aku perlu sangat kehadiran dia dengan aku... aku terasa macam, kalau di sini laa janji aku dengan Allah, biarlah am jadi orang terakhir yang aku tengok... sebab hanya Allah saje yang tau betapa aku sayangkan dia... kalau dia baca ni memang berbakul2 aku kena marah, kuasa Allah tak ada sape yang bleh halangkan.. aku cuma minta doa dari kawan2 semua supaya aku dipermudahkan bersalin dan selamat... korang tak tau do.. aku cuak cam tahap gaban...

first time raya sbagai isteri agak menarik pada aku.. sebab aku ada suami yang baru masuk darjah satu sekolah romantik... tak feel do salam raya... siap aku tersua2 dahi suh dia cium.. last2 kena cakap verbally jugak.. sia2 dahi aku jendul... tapi pengalaman beraya di johor ni memang fresh.. johorian memang beraya selagi ada bulan syawal... aku paling suka tradisi marhaban dari rumah ke rumah kat sini, aku tak tau tempat lain ada ke tak tapi kawasan perumahan aku kat kuantan tu memang tak ada... aku bukan hafal sangat pun marhaban sampai ke abes, aku awal2 ye kuat.. tang nak last2 tu aku meraban laa.. buat2 la tengok semut ke anai2 ke kat lantai.. jangan tengok cicak, nanti orang nampak mulut ko tak gerak.. buat2 miming je..

personally aku harap akan bergelar ibu hujung mingu ni... aku ada laa amalkan sket2 tips untuk mempercepatkan bersalin, tapi sume pun bergantung kepada rezeki... barang2 baby pun insyaAllah rasanya dah ada sume, termasuk la jamu selapan untuk ibu yang baunye mak datuk cam haram jadah... tapi mengenangkan aku ni kawin tak sampai setahun pun lagi, laki aku muda lagi, dah jadik ayah sat gi saham dia makin naik... akan aku telan apa saje untuk balik ke bentuk badan sewaktu anak dara yang tak ada laa kurus sangat pun tapi itu la yang menambat hati dia nak kawin ngan aku dulu kan...

hah, tengah2 aku type ni.. ntah apa sumpahan ntah, aku tertumpah air atas laptop.. cikalat..

ni aku dah tukar ke pc office, dah petang pun, tadi pagi lagi.. laptop tadi jangan tanya, air mencurah cam niagara falls, agaknye camtu lebat jugak ke duit aku nak repair tuh nanti.. fuh fuh fuh tenang... aku memang cemerkap betul dalam tempoh ngandung ni, aku pecahkan pinggan, cawan, dua kali cubaan bakar rumah, jatuh kerusi, jatuh bilik air, tersadung sana sini... tapi Alhamdulillah.. aku dan anakku ini masih di dalam lindunganNya... semoga kekal sehingga selamat nanti...

nak transfer gamba pun cam dah tak ada mood sebab gamba banyak dalam laptop yang dah banjir tadi, oleh itu.. aku pun izin laluan laa, nak makan nasi plak, tadi nak makan selera dah potong... doakan aku ye tuan puan... aku takut ni.. maklumla orang banyak dosa...
sebut pasal dosa, aku pun nak mintak maaf banyak2 pada semua yang kenal aku dan pernah gurau senda dan terasa hati ngan aku.. aku jugak mintak halalkan la segala makan minum, hutang ke kalau ada yang aku lupa dan ko malu nak mintak, eheheeheh... mintak di 0-0 kan la ea... terima kasih pada yang komen pada entry aku yang ada gamba scan tu, aku mintak maaf tak reply pun, buruk perangai memang macam ni... tapi aku hargai setiap komen korang... terharu mak rasa nyah...

i love you all, tapi i love lagi bau nasi goreng ngan ikan asam pedas yang dah semerbak satu ofis ni... salam semua.. muah muah muah

adios,
xoxoxoxo

hey ho hey ho!!!!

2009-08-21T10:09:00.004+08:00

ITS MY BIRTHDAY!!!!

muahahahahahaahaha...

thanks for all the warm wishes from dear families and friends...

am paksa kucing² sume wish aku bday.. thanks, i like!!
dan dia juga wish tanpa henti dari subuh² sampai sekarang.. thanks, I SGT LIKE!!!

27.. 27 .. 27...... apa ada pada nombor.. yang penting HAPPY!!!!

so HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY AZIE!!!!!!

p/s: oh, pagi tadi terslip dalam toilet.. tapi jatuh tak kuat sangat.. insyaAllah sume oke.. amin...

adios,

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

alhamdulillah..ketemu lagi kita...

2009-08-21T09:48:00.003+08:00

ALHAMDULILLAH..

bertemu lagi kita pada tahun ini...

Ramadhan kali ini lebih istimewa.. pertama kali berpuasa sebagai seorang isteri..

dan yang lebih penting... sebagai seorang MAK YONG!!!

akan ku cuba berpuasa hingga ke akhirnya, oleh itu cik baby sila beri kerjasama...

eheheheheee

i did asked around for info on pregnancy during ramadhan, and most of the feedback are positive..what's important is will power.. oke cik baby.. will power oke, not austin powers...

selamat berpuasa buat semua yang tersayang, kawan², kenalan dan semua yang berpuasa...

ramadhan datang setiap tahun, bilakan ramadhan yang terakhir buat kite, hanya ALLAH MAHA MENGETAHUINYA... oleh itu, marilah kite sama² berharap dan berusaha (harap saja maknanya parah) agar Ramadhan kali ini penuh bermakna...insyaAllah...

adios,

xoxo..

high risk group - checked!!

2009-08-18T09:44:00.003+08:00

dear beloved friends and family...

you might think that H1N1 will never infect you.. well then, you might be right...

but what if.......

and if the what if happens, and it doesn't affect you the most, but the one so dear to you.. so close to your heart... the one that falls under the high risk categories... how would you feel then?

sorry? sad? anger? or regret?

wearing a mask doesn't just mean to protect yourself.. more importantly, its to protect "the one" with lower immunity level around you..

so don't be shy.. don't feel awkward.. don't feel alienated... because those feelings will only makes you feel worse if the worst did happened...

yesterday, a 7mths old baby died of this, what if this poor little baby is yours? or your siblings? or your niece, nephew? how can helpless little babies or toddlers protect themself? we should do that for them.. instead of putting them to risk everytime we are around them......

there's definitely nothing wrong with BETTER BE SAFE, THAN SORRY...

because there's no undo options in real life...

then again, it's not about you.. its about those around you... do not lead yourself to guilt the rest of your life...think again.. act wiser...

those who gives you the queer look, or a sneer face wont be there for you if you get infected, they will stay even farther away, and will even accuse you.. so why should you give in to them?

LET'S HELP IN DECREASING THE NUMBER OF CASES.. AND OF COURSE.. DEATHS....

it starts with you and me...

adios,

xoxo from yours truly....

extension of o-o

2009-08-15T09:44:00.004+08:00

okah and okid is no longer a duo...

now there's an addition of 4 tails, 16 feets and 4 mouths to feed!!!

voilaa..

okah's and okid's breed:

meet acai, perang, kenit and citam.. (clockwise) :)

only managed to capture these 2, the other 2 were happily jumping around breaking vases and tearing down curtains...

you can see how "koreng" (jawa for comot) they look... but they are adorable like all kittens were!! playful.. actually too playful..

okid decided to gave birth on my lap, and i was surprised but thrilled at the same time..

i thought she just want to spend another evening watching tv on my lap as she usually did..

but suddenly my feet is wet with a warm liquid and she was purring extra loud.. a few panicked moments later (me not her) the first kitten was born!!!

i witnessed all four births and was very glad that they were all safe and healthy, the excited father (okah.. and a few other male cats in the neighbourhood, sigh..) was forbidden to come near the new born and their mother... okid is a very protective mother, and she nursed the kitten until their tummy was so bulat and they cant walk properly.. aku slalu curik² peluk the kittens when okid was away gi minum or makan.. sebab geram yang amat sangat...

they are about 4 months old now, dah besar pun.. sangat manja.. if you picked them up, they will start to purr so loud and automatically all the bones in their body is gone.. sengaja melembikkan badan denga aksi² manja melampau.. rasa cam nak hempas... ahahahahahahaa

its a pleasant addition to the family, and we are expecting a second batch of o-o jr's in a few months time since okid's tummy look extra big nowadays.. mak aihh cepatnye berkembang biak... am thinking to give the soon coming kittens away..

but do i have the heart to part with those big-eyed kittens when they arrived? we'll see.. we'll see... :p

adios,

xoxoxoxo....

the love of my life....

2009-08-14T12:26:00.003+08:00

abang,

terima kasih kerana terlalu banyak bersabar dengan kerenah ayu sepanjang tempoh perkahwinan kite yang tak jejak pun setahun lagi ni... you know this is not normally me.. tu lah, sape suh efektif sangat bunting pelamin..

our bundle of joy is growing healthily day after day due to your great care and concern.. "ayu dah makan ubat?.. ayu nah minum susu ni.. ayu oke ke?.. ayu terhentak² ke naik kete abang?.. duduk² ayu, jangan diri.. dah la tak apa biar abang buat.. ayu rehat je,tak apa abang tak kisah.." and the list goes on and on and on...

you are definitely a gift from GOD, an answer to my prayers... ayu tak bleh bayangkan how's my life is going to be if its not you in the picture.. your patience level never fails to amaze me.. and i prayed hard to GOD, may our bundle of joy inherits that from you...

i am certainly one lucky women to have such a wondeful husband.. and i promised you that i devote my life to you.. terima kasih mak kerana sudi berkongsi anak sebaik am dengan saya mak.. i'm sorry our relationship wasn't that smooth before..

to bundle of joy, dad deserves all the respects in the world.. do listen to him and obey him.. and make him proud.. he adores you more than me, but that's ok since you are a part of me... and if anything ever happens to me, i'll know that you are in good hands.. and he certainly will always put you first in everything..

that's why i think, my husband deserves it..the Jean Paul Gaultier -Fluer Du Male 75ml, EDT that IBU EMIR is giving away for this month's contest..
a little treat for my greatest hero... it can never be enough since only GOD can repay you...

ayu sayangkan abang...

love,

ayu isteri abang...

BEHOLD, MY FIRST APPEARANCE!!!

2009-04-01T10:22:00.005+08:00

hello aunts and uncles, i'm 6 weeks old, with the length of 0.59cm.. and MY VERY OWN HEART BEAT!!!!

pray for me that i'll get bigger, stronger and healthier.. pray that mom eat well because she didn't eat much lately.. :(

as much as i'm looking forward to seeing all of you, im currently very comfortable in mom's tummy, and not planning to leave soon.. do wait for my moments on earth!!

to mom and dad, i love you...

love,

baby...

dear little baby,

we love you too.. no matter how many morning sickness yet mom have to go through, the severe loss of apetite, extreme fatigueness, headaches and what not.. it never once reduces our fondness for you..

and dad is really patient to put up with all of these.. and always, always being there to support mom... the joy on his face seeing you for the first time on the screen at the hospital is priceless, and he's very looking forward to hold you in his arm and teaching you to call him, bapak!!

so, grow!! strong, healthy... and if it's possible, dont let mom craving for food that's difficult to find.. :)

more love,

mom and dad

*it bring tears to my eyes writing this... oh the mood swings...

adios,

xoxo

A PAINFUL LESSON, OUCH!!!

2009-03-24T08:40:00.002+08:00

Angry wives chop off cheating husband's manhood ~Bernama

NEW DELHI, SUN:

Two young women frustrated with their husbands'' sexual promiscuity decided to teach their partners a painful lesson -- by slicing off their manhood.

One of the women, a 39-year-old from Katihar district in Bihar state, unable to cope with her husband''s persistent illicit affair with another woman from the same village, admonished her husband several times but blew her top when she caught him in the act with his ex-beau in the family bedroom.

After a morning quarrel last week, the wife decided to settle her vengeance by trying to slice off Singh's private organ using a sharp blade.

"It was a domestic dispute and a case was reported on the woman. She is out on bail and living with her parents now. She had attacked her husband using a sharp object; he suffered minor injuries and is fit now,*saved by a few inches of skin i guess..:)*" Katihar superintendent of police Anil Kishore Yadav told Bernama.

Villagers had rushed the husband, in his 30s and a peon at a local school, to a nearby hospital where doctors managed to save him from any worse trauma.

But the anger on infidelity reached a peak and was far scarier in Ahmedabad, Gujarat, where another fuming wife chopped off her husband's manhood early this month after discovering that he was having sexual relations with other women.

In a well-planned revenge, the 35-year-old wife from Amraiwadi district lured her unfaithful husband to bed after sedating him during dinner.

Thinking he was in for a nice bondage sexual rendezvous *haha, got you!!*, the excited 30-year-old husband, got into bed where the wife tied both his hands and legs to the bed using ropes. In a fit of rage, she cut off his penis using a sharp knife.

"She had nicely planned the whole attack after she caught her husband doing it with his ex-woman. She gave him some sedation and tied his limbs and hands to the bed. Once he got excited, she chopped off his organ.

"The organ was completely cut off and they brought it in two pieces. Doctors did some skin grafting but could not reconnect it. It was badly cut and he can''t function, *wuhuu, off with his toot.. not so lucky* " Dr Gautam Sharma, assistant administrator at the Civil Hospital in Amraiwadi, where the victim was treated, told Bernama.

Police detained the woman for questioning and the husband was discharged from hospital.

~hey you, looking for piccies aaa, no laaa,, none attached.. im not interested to publish a disfunctional organ of someone... ahahaha.. gross!!!

~for all adulterers out there, WATCH YOUR TOOT OR YOU MIGHT LOSE IT!!!

adios,
xoxo? not in the mood... blah!!

aku tau...

2009-03-23T15:34:00.004+08:00

~~KHAS UNTUK SEORANG TEMAN BAIK YANG INGAT AKU TAK TAU APA KO RAHSIAKAN DAN TIPU PADA AKU~~

found this at amieheidi's under her Jangan Dekati Zina post..

her best said words for me:

"Guys, girls, cinta atu Allah turunkan suci, mun inda, inda tia ada doa ‘Ya Allah , kurniakan aku cintaMu, dan cinta orang-orang yang mencintaiMu dan cintakanlah aku pada amalan yang mendekatkan cintaMu’.
Jagalah kesucian cinta yang Allah bagi atu, and jangan campur-adukkan dangan zina."

aku tau ko nak cakap, aa bising la aku sekarang kan, sebab aku dah kawin..

aku pun tau ko nak cakap gak, alaa azie ko pun dulu pegang² tangan gak..

aku tau... :), TAPI AKU MASIH TAU BATAS AKU... ko jangan lupa tu...

eheheheh...

tapi aku nak cakap gak sebab aku sayang ko.. alhamdulillah aku dah kawin, ada rezeki aku, ko dah tau ke? ahahaha *bukan nak berlagak, saje gurau²..*

lagipun sekarang aku insyaAllah dah nak jadi ibu, aku kena la betulkan diri aku dulu...

cuba ko tengok ke belakang sekejap, dalam ko sebok mengejar "cinta" si mata duitan itu *ko mati² takkan terimanye orang cakap camni*... adalah lebih besar makna dan pahala kalau duit yang ko salurkan kepada dia tu, ko kasik la kat mak ayah ko, kalau ko tak nak la kasik mak ayah ko sangat, ko beli la apa² ko nak untuk ko sendirik, kan ko selalu mintak kat orang dulu masa bday ko... ko nak *toot*... haa kumpul la duit ko tu, beli.. SUDAH SUDAH LA KASIK PADA ORANG YANG CINTANYE KO BELI...

tuhan tu maha kaya, ko tipu aku, ko putar cite, ko tak gitau jujur.. tapi kalau dah takdirnya akan sampai ke telinga aku, ko dah tak bleh nak halang lagi... aku bukan nak amek tau sangat hal ko... duit ko kan, suka hati ko la kan.. aku tegur ko sebagai seorang sahabat, sebab aku tau kalau ko di tempat aku, ko juga akan buat bende yang sama... kalau ko masih tak bleh terima.. anggap la aku tegur ko seperti nasihat dari seorang perempuan kepada perempuan yang lain.. macam ko baca² kat majalah tu...

TAPI SATU KO KENA INGAT... sabar aku dan orang² lain ada hadnye... aku pasti ko masih blum lupa kan apa yang dah jadi dulu antara aku dengan ko.. KALI INI AKU TAK AKAN TOLONG KO BETULKAN KEADAAN LAGI.. ko tanggung lah bara api yang ko cipta sendiri ni... aku bukan kejam, cuma dah tak kuasa nak amek peduli...

dan buat si lelaki jahanam, semoga ko terus ke neraka JAHANNAM... yang sesuai dengan ko selama²nya...

astagfirullah... *orang ngandung tak baik marah²*

untuk ko, no XOXO...

adios....

inai di jari... :)

2009-03-19T09:46:00.005+08:00

tapi bukan jari aku ni.. jari ni kedut2 ehehehee :p

inai aku masih di jari, separuh kuku lagi ada... tapi dalam ni dah ada baby....

YES PEOPLE!! i'm 7 weeks preggie... alhamdulillah

this is so unexpected, sebab my self test result came out as negative twice!!

this is like a dream, as if this happened to someone else, and i'm listening to it, watching it...

as im writing this, my baby is growing.. MY BABY.. oh god, i never thought of having one so quick.. tapi alhamdulillah, rezeki dari ALLAH..

both parents were estatic, like M.I.L said, kaya cucu lah dia tahun ni.. she will receive 2 including mine, but mine will be the THIRD for my parents!!!

thanks a zillion to all the congrats wishes from dear friends.. and even from AFIQ.. my lil fren on the bus a year plus ago, thanks a lot darlingsssss.... looks like my baby akan ada a bunch of very interesting gorgeous aunts and uncles...

i can only make my card in 2-3 weeks time, as it is still too early to do it now.. i am being extra cautious with what im doing now.. and what i ate.. i do not feel any morning sickness, alhamdulillah.. but i dislike to eat rice, and my bowel movement is quite active.. hehehee... apakah??

my one and only adik dah selamat diijabkabul kan dengan tunang dia, aishah.. bahagiala korang ke akhirnye insyaALLAH, jangan lupa tanggungjawab pada keluarga..gamba? blum lagi.. soon (hopefully)

i do hope i can support the EARTH HOUR and really hope that you can join the wagon too.. it will be a little effort in showing that we do care of our tired mother earth...

check out this link for more: http://www.earthhour.org/

untuk sementara waktu,

adios,

xoxo

aku, kau dan dia.. watever.. haha

2009-03-07T11:39:00.007+08:00

Do You think you don't know enough about yourself that you have to take a quiz created by God-knows-who to determine who you really are ? Doesn't matter the answer is yes or no, because you're it! =P And don't forget to tag it afterward!

1. Open this website : http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx (Should this add does not appear as a link, copy and paste it on ur add bar)

2. Take the Personality Quiz

3. Copy Paste the result to Facebook ---> (another facebook tag done in blog!!)

4. Tag your friends including me :) ---> (no one tag me, ahahaha... i read this at farina's, and did it to kill time, another half and hour to 1200, balik!!)

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

this is sort of, the type of lake i imagined, with the swan, minus the dog..

but maybe this is what my heart really pictures, with bunch of soul mates rather than alone.. ahahaha.. and so much fun!!!!

LAYAN!!

adios,

xoxo

a little bit of this, a little bit of that...

2009-03-04T08:45:00.002+08:00

ola..

a week passed by with nothing out of normalities.. my cats getting fatter and so does the owner.. ahaha.. my trial and error in cooking, a few birthdays, conversations with friends and families.. no adrenaline rush..

my younger brother will be hitched by next weekend, so off we go to kelantan.. if money permits, i would like to have a few new tudung, or what ever else that's catchy and suddenly become basics need to my life..

oh yea, this one incident with DINERS CLUB, who is so not looking after their customers.. my extreme inconvenience dealing with them is sooooo not an isolated case.. am's been there and done it too.. WHAT's WITH THEM??? anyone interested in making any kind of deal with them, be prepared for the lowest grade of service..

im currently evaluating between working with the goverment or not.. in this moment of economic unstability, working with the gov have a few more advantages but there are certain issues that bothers me.. is it true that we will only be paid after 3 months of services? this bothers me the most, besides the fact that basic pay is quite low as well..

im late.. if you know what i mean, but nothing new about that.. so there's no reason to jump and down yet.. i'll just wait for another few weeks before buying the test kit again..

my M.I.L just opened two homestays.. one in Desaru Utama and another in Bandar Penawar.. both houses still need a few add-ons, so this weekend will be spent for final touch-ups.. the price is fairly affordable, and the houses are comfy.. will put on a proper adverts once piccies are taken and leaflets are ready...

i guess i have nothing left to babble about.. hey, i can see you yawn!! ahahaaa..

adios,
xoxo

khamis malam jumaat

2009-02-26T10:49:00.004+08:00

gud morning earthlings!!

i have visitors today.. azlina and adrian from kl hq... they are here to collect documents for PCSB's meeting next week.. and surprise surprise.. en.johan the big bos, came too.. with his wife and cute smiley little joel jordan.. who's wearing a ben 10 arm band this time.. the last time he came, he was spiderman..

and guess what.. i got an ANGPAU!!!
gud gud.. after a month ada lagi orang nak kasik angpau, ini namanye rejeki.. rajin² la baca ayat seribu dinar.. eheheee..

last nite, am was really a sleepyhead.. he slept in front of the tv while mother was talking to him.. he replied with a snore!! hahaha... lawak sungguh.. macam² bunyik ada.. i woke him up around 2300 for isya' prayer.. he cant wait to sleep sampaikan masa baca doa, dia baca doa qunut!!

aku dah tak tahan nak gelak, tapi aku biarkan sebab doa la jugak kan.. abes tu memang bantai kakaw laa..

aku masih mengemas ofis, malam ni balik rumah mak lagi.. probably until weekend.. since we will be receiving a group of 60 students from UKM, nak tumpang rumah mak before starting their activity apa ntah.. all i know is there is a lot of cleaning to be done... till then people, see you when i see you...

p/s: title itu tafsir sendiri la maksud tersiratnye... ha ha ha... :p

adios,
xoxo

hari ini hari rabu

2009-02-25T12:04:00.004+08:00

from kak riri's email:

the writings a bit blurry, but still readable.. i like that, especially the last part, hehee... mentioning the word baby, aku sedikit kegelabahan last week...

i was feeling nausea, dizzy and blackout for a few days.. since tarikh² tertentu turut menyokong, we bought a pregnancy test kit.. and the result:

hehehe.. cuak yang bukan², it turns out aku hanyalah mengalami indigestion dan menyebabkan kembung berangin satu badan.. bukan kembung anak orang.. eheehe

i found this in my office, dalam salah satu drawer antara dua orang staff ofis aku yang dah resign:

giler aaah!!! tapi itu gambar hiasan.. aku jumpa bungkus kain kuning, ikat atas bawah, macam gula².. mati hidup balik aku tak akan sentuh, apa lagi nak bukak!!

aku inform kat mak cik cleaner aku,

aku: kak esah nak tengok magic tak?

kak esah: apa dia?

aku: *seraya membuka laci* ni haa, saya jumpa masa kemas2 laci ni....

kak esah: eh, apa ea, rasa seram sejuk badan ni haa..

apa lagi, tepon la ghost buster.. eheehe.. datang la ghost buster .. dengan sekalian audience berbondong².. am pun datang, dan mus juga.. ni aku yang panggil.. abang tu memang mahir dalam bab² supernatural ini..

dia yang amek dan bukak, am suh dia bukak kat luar, tapi tak sampai, depan pintu dah bukak dah.. ehehee.. dalam kain kuning itu ada ayat.. dalam tulisan jawi, am sempat baca sket je sebelum abang tu terus tutup dan lipat balik.. dia hanya nampak perkataan " aku mohon...."
abang tu cakap, ni tak ada apa, orang yang buat ni mintak dia sentiasa dilindung, supaya orang tak bleh kacau dia.. macam pendinding laa.. agak tak cukup lagi ke dinding office ni nak tambah dinding lagi.. AMARAN KERAJAAN MALAYSIA: MEMPERCAYAI TANGKAL DAN AZIMAT ADALAH SYIRIK DAN HARAM DI SISI ISLAM.

aku sebenarnya tak tau apa nak rasa.. aku mungkin masih terkejut.. seraya menjadi hilang ingatan.. kenapa aku yang kena jumpa di waktu menjadi the last man standing di dalam office itu.. akibatnye? aku bukak je pintu office aku sendal ngan fire extinguisher.. lantak laa confidential ke tak confidential office aku tu.. heheheee..

aku memasak lempeng dua hari lepas, cubaan pertama.. lagu exist - "oh goreng lempeng, lempeng yang hangus" ----> at least lempeng dia ada rupa lempeng laa.. lempeng aku dah macam jemput².. apa hal ntah... am makan jugak.. kesian laa dia.. tadah aje laa...

aku nak sambung balik aktiviti mengemas office.. harap² jangan la aku jumpa lagi yang bukan²..
kena mandi bunga plak aku nanti nak naik semangat.. ehehee.. malam ni balik rumah mak.. ergh.. esok kena bangun awal... kalau duk rumah sendiri, aku ngan am memang liat bangun awal.. bertolak².. hari² masuk keje 8.10am.. tunggu aje laa warning letter.. ke aku bagi resign letter dulu?? eheheee.. doakan la aku murah rezeki.. bleh aku buat lempeng banyak² lagi sampai pandai... amin...

adios,
xoxo

amieheidi..

2009-02-18T14:10:00.005+08:00

i love reading amieheidi's entries..
selalu menyedarkan yang terlalai.. dan mengingatkan yang terlupa..

Only by Remembering Allah, the heart is content

her latest entry.. to my dear friend fiejo yang sedang berluka lara.. let us share this together..

her entry on Palestinian's plight are also touching... it makes one feel so lucky to be alive and live away from the war land..

still, only by remembering our Maker, the heart is content...

adios,

xoxo

just think..

2009-02-18T11:44:00.005+08:00

looks like i do have a lot of ample time today aa... :) found this in a friend's blog, thought i share it since it's a waste to keep sumthing so "menginsafkan"

the story goes:

There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she’s blind.
She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He’s always there for her.
She said that if she could only see the world, she would marry her boyfriend.
One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and then she can see everything, including her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend asked her, "now that you can see the world, will you marry me?"
The girl was shocked when she saw that her boyfriend is blind too, and refused to marry him.
Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote a letter to her saying.
"Just take care of my eyes dear."

This is how humans change when their status changes. Only few remember what life was before, and who has always been there in the most painful situations. therefore;

Today before you think of saying an unkind word

--> Think of someone who can’t speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food

--> Think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife

-->Think of someone who’s crying out to God for a companion.

Today before you complain about life

-->Think of someone who went too early to heaven.

Before you complain about your children

-->Think of someone who desires children but they’re barren.

Before you argue about your dirty house, someone didn’t clean or sweep

-->Think of the people who are living in the streets.

Before whining about the distance you drive

-->Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.

And when you are tired and complaining about your job

-->Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job.

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another

-->Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down

-->Put a smile on your face and thank God you’re alive and still around.

iza once told me; "if we have the luxury to grumble, we must have life better than most"

i bet you're right dear!! the next time i'll open my mouth to complain anything, i hope my brain is faster in sending me this reminder...

adios,

xoxo

saya nak beli vokal A untuk....

2009-02-18T10:08:00.002+08:00

copied this from farina.. looks interesting to complete.. syiok!!

Rules:It's harder than it looks! Copy to your own note, erase my answers, enter yours, and tag ten people. Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real...nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.

1. What is your name : Azie

2. A four Letter Word : Aiya!!

3. A boy's Name : Annuar Zain (ahahaha)

4. A girl's Name : Aidatul Azrin Azam

5. An occupation : Architect

6. A color : Amber

7. Something you'll wear : A-line skirts

9. A food : Anchovies

10. Something found in the bathroom : Ambi Pur

11. A place : Afganistan

12. A reason for being late : Amnesia

13. Something you'd shout : A**h*le!!

14. A movie title : American Pie

15. Something you drink : Apple Juice

16. A musical group : AzYet

17. An animal : Ayam Piru

18. A street name : AKLEH (Ampang-KL Elevated Highway)

19. A type of car : Audi

20. The title of a song : Andai Ku Tahu - Ungu..

senang je.. try test??
~~adrian, fiejo, tote, fida, fatma, syuhai, yayi, yatya, hanin, farah lily

adios,
xoxo

jawab lagi..

2009-02-18T09:47:00.003+08:00

ditag oleh wafa dan man dalam facebook, tapi aku nak tiru anis jawab kat sini bleh? cam lagi best.. muahahah, suka hati aku laa blog aku..

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you!! ---> yeah right!!

1. my name is azie

2. or azie azam

3. or azheazam

4. i'm married

5. just married, so no kids yet..

6. i;m chubby

7. but lovely.. (sadap u)

8. i love my cats, okah and okid

9. i am not afraid to hold snakes or crocs IF they are tame and with their guardian..

10. i talk a lot

11. i burp loud, but seri's the champion

12. i love my friends.. very much

13. i dont drink coffee

14. i own a car, my little silver perodua kenari which i adore deeply..

15. when i drive alone, i drive fast

16. i used to have lots of boyfriends (monkey love)

17. i'm planning to be debt free by the age of 35

18. i want to own a business one day

19. i love to read

20. but only selected authors

21. i love harry potter series

22. soooo much that i want to be hermione granger

23. i love to eat

24. i love my family more than anything

25. i love myself..

tadaaa.. DONE

to tag 25 people? mak ooi ramainye..
jawapannye tak payah laa..

adios,
xoxo

jawab jangan tak jawab!!

2009-02-18T08:44:00.004+08:00

TAGGED!!! by Farina..

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
~~ nay..

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRY?
~~ last week, think so..

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
~~ yes, its pretty ugly.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE LUNCH MEAL?
~~ rice with japanese tofu and kangkung belacan and fried chicken..

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
~~ none that i know of..

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
~~ why not?

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
~~ yes

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
~~ see for yourself, ngaaaaa

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
~~ definitely, with layers and layers of cushions down below, (kes nak tapi paranoid nak mam)

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE CEREAL?
~~ the tastiest stars in the universe, HONEY STARS

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
~~ nay..

12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE ICE CREAM?
~~ dont eat ice cream that much, but i'll go for asam boi, ehehe

13. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
~~ nothing, im not a good observer..

14. RED OR PINK?
~~ red, blood red

15. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVOURITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
~~ my temper

16. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
~~ you? ;p

17. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
~~ suka hati la labu..

18. WHAT COLOUR OF PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
~~ black jeans and black sandals

19. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
~~ my life would suck without you, kellly clarkson.. from fida's blog..

20. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOUR WOULD YOU BE?
~~ why would i want to be a crayon?

21. FAVOURITE SMELLS?
~~ hubby's armpit, ahahahahahahaah

22. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
~~ my hubby

23. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
~~ farina? of cosh definitely do..

24. FAVOURITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
~~ gymrama, its fun and beautiful..

25. HAIR COLOUR?
~~dark brown

26. EYE COLOUR
~~ cannot see, ahahahaah

27. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
~~ no way!! too scary..

28 FAVOURITE FOOD?
~~ i eat anything halalan toyyiba..

29. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
~~ scary movies with happy endings, cause i'll be relieved that the "ghost" died..

30. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
~~ bedtime stories with adrian

31. WHAT COLOUR OF SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
~~ a mixture of red, black, yellow and white.. (mak aih,byk nye kale)

32. SUMMER OR WINTER?
~~ neither, i like khatulistiwa..

33. HUGS OR KISSES?
~~ ni je? ehehehehh

34. FAVOURITE DESSERT?
~~ coconut jelly.. yum yum..

35. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
~~ whut? can u repeat the question?

36. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
~~ hah? apo?

37.WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING?
~~ hannibal lecter series by thomas harris

38. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
~~ a black mouse

39. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
~~ Bulletin Utama, Kau Milikku, Kasanova XXL.. (kes malas nak angkat bontot amek remote astro tukar channel)

40. FAVOURITE SOUND(S)?
~~ one that doesnt give me headache and heartache..

41. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
~~ kumbang ke batu? kumbang ke batu? KUMBANG..

42. WHERE IS THE FURTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
~~ kayangan, (dalam mimpi)

43. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
~~ does reading aloud a special talent?

44. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
~~ hospital..

45. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
~~ adrian, fida, lina a.k.a tote, fiejo, min, fatma, syuhai...

Wassalamu...

adios,
xoxo

next event of the year.:

2009-02-11T09:17:00.002+08:00

ola ola..

dijemput semua rakan dan taulan ke majlis menyambut menantu (aku la tu, hehee) di rumah am a.k.a ototh sabtu ini...

kad? takde softcopy kat aku laa, petang ke malam sket aku upload la dari rumah ibu mertuaku..

i will be taking off day starting from this evening until next week.. cuti lagi la aku ni.. to all you guys planning to be married soon, make sure simpan cuti banyak².. seriyesly you will be needing it.. try to replace taking annual leave with MC's, ko tonyoh la syampu dalam mata, like you never did it before kan masa belaja²..

at ototh's house, tak pakai caterer macam rumah aku.. sini rewang ye cik puan, and the event cronologies:

Thursday night: Yassin recitation event
Friday night: Marhaban recital event
Saturday : the event..

and for every event, rewang.. masak sendiri.. tulis pun aku dah terasa penat nye dan betapa banyaknye keje.. lucky for me i am the bride on saturday so bleh excuse kejap.. huhu..
moi family will be arriving on friday, and 15th tu abah's birthday.. am thinking of a celebration at marrybrown.. the only fast food outlet available here.. ehehee..

apa lagi, aku pun dah lupa.. terdistract dengan fon calls from along and abah.. will post more wedding piccies bila dah receive nanti.. till then..

adios,
xoxo

life after 24th jan 2009...

2009-02-05T11:07:00.010+08:00

malas nye nak update.. untukmu adrian.. aku buat jugak..

(kira adiah birthday ko la, aci ea)

married life? most common reaction:

1. a bliss

2. wonderful

3. amazing

etc....

for me?

its a life changing experience... which requires a lot of energy, both pyhsically and mentally..

it is of course still amazing and so on.. but phew.. am i exhausted...

wedding piccies from my photographer is not available yet, but from weeza's lenses are now available on her facebook.. (and mine, since i tagged myself on almost every single pic)

thanks to all my penyeri majlis!! (seri,weeza,min,tote,shafi and husband and my precious iza)

and deepest gratitue to farina and her adik fadila.. for making me look cantik!! hahahaa

to all LOCUSTERS, who crashed the solemnization ceremony (all of them declined the invitation before, mind you!!) i was stunned to all the flashing lights.. apa lagi ototh.. he was suddenly nervewrecked by the sudden crowd of beaming faces of the LOCUSTERS, naseb baek ada yang menenangkan..tapi, THANKS A LOT FOR COMING!! sudi jugak korang datang rumah aku kat kuantan.. heheee..

thanks a zillion for all those who came and all the congrats wishes.. and the presents too.. thanks fatma and syu.. walaupun korang tak dapat datang, adiah korang sampai.. ehehehe.. thankss!!

no matter how many times i thanked all of you.. it still doesnt describe the feeling i felt inside...

i heart you all!!!

adios,

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo to infinity...

and beyond!!! ~~ buzz lightyear..

khas untuk abang dari ayu...

2009-01-16T22:24:00.005+08:00

abang...

kurang dari seminggu kita dah bleh duk serumah, dah bleh kuar balik lewat² malam...

kurang dari seminggu, dah bleh jalan pegang² tangan.. peluk² pinggang (tapi tu sekarang pun dah ada..huhu)

kurang dari seminggu, kita akan jaga satu sama lain.. abang jaga ayu.. dan ayu jaga abang...

kurang dari seminggu, kalau kita gaduh bleh terus baik.. tak payah tunggu lama²...

kurang dari seminggu, semua barang ayu barang abang, semua barang abang barang ayu...kita kongsi semua...

kurang dari seminggu, keluarga abang keluarga ayu, keluarga ayu pun abang punya...

kurang dari seminggu, ayu milik abang.. dan abang hak ayu selamanya...

kurang dari seminggu, cinta kita selama 5 tahun ni.. terbukti terpateri selamanya.....

insyaALLAH...

ayu sayangkan abang, selagi ayu bernyawa...

adios,
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

my wedding invitation..

2009-01-16T21:36:00.002+08:00

a very good day to all...

i hereby invited all of you to my wedding reception as per above details..

i know i know.. none of you will be coming, hehehhee...

just send me your prayers..

i need that, a lot of it...

i'm looking forward to be married, cold feet has left me yesterday..

now i am really 'gatal merenyam' nak kawin!!!

ehehehehe...

thank you... to those who lent their shoulders and ears...i heart you all!!

adios,

xoxo

breaking the silence...

2009-01-13T11:11:00.011+08:00

whoa..

i've been looking forward to updating my blog, with all the excitements and drama in my life (talking about a drama queen, :p)

i've been spending the last two weeks in KL, mainly for work for the first few days..towards the end, its gala fun, muahahaha..

i've started 2009 with a crisis, very early in the morning, i had a tiff with my future-mother-in-law.. (not the first one, people..) haha.. the issue circles round the "wedding band" controversy, which until now, i haven't resolved yet.. the issue affected my fragile relationship with abang pretty badly, the thing with "between me and his mother" never favours me.. and ended up with me.. driving 140km/hr on my poor little kenari welling up in tears all the way to KL...

moi family weren't really on my side this time, i was always blamed when it comes to this kind of conflict, (why oh why??) feeling very unloved, and totally controlled by emotions, i put my whole life to god.. whether i arrived safely or not, i dont even bother.. i just want to be out of this, away for a while, leaving all the excess baggage behind me and forget it completely..temporary,sigh...

i leave office around noon, and i arrived at nilai at 4 pm sumthing, stopping to get gas, and meeting mr.cute who was promoting maybank credit cards there.. i was really not in a mood for anything, what more getting a new credit card, but he insisted.. and since he's a soothe for the eye (hahaha), i gave him what he wanted.. (sounds fishy haa, signing up for the card. of coz!!) he gave his namecard (which i'd lost later on..huhu) and the hunk name is fakhruz.. he gave my life that day a little sun shine...

2nd jan, peon's solemnization.. i didnt attend it due to some reasons, but i did went shopping with my officemate in KL.. retail therapy hah.. looks like it.. mr. fakhruz contacted me.. with his personal number (tadaaaa!!) and we're officially friends.. he put a lot of smiles on my face during the whole last week.. but before you girls started singing rihanna's unfaithful to me, please take note that i openly told him that i was engaged with a reception a few weeks away.. and we have to stick to FRIENDS ONLY relationship... he was ok with that, me? how can i say no... (haish...)

i spent the first week in KL working my guts out.. staying till very late in the night, and once until 6 am in the morning.. but that doesnt stopped me from my retail therapy sessions.. hehehe.. no guilt, none at all.. after the tender was submitted.. adrian and i spend the whole morning, asleep.. and the rest of the evening.. watching "Bedtime Stories" at KLCC.. yeehuuu!! my dear bos gave us a leave that day.. appreciating our hard work.. nice nice...

friday was spent doing office work here and there and lunch hour back to retail therapy this time at midvall.. (i shopped at KLCC, Sogo, danau kota and now midvall.. and I LIKE!!!)

i spend half of my stay at my sis's house in kg baru and another half at adrian's.. both were very good hostesses in keeping me hostage..haha.. thanks for the warmth and hospitality.. it helps me to alleviate the troubles i left behind..

finally, the day i've been looking forward to has come.. SATURDAY, the picnic day.. ouh i meet lina a.k.a tote on friday night, and we stayed at Leo Palace instead of Dynasty.. and we screamed at each other all the way from kg. baru lrt to the hotel.. what a noise..

SATURDAY is A BLAST!! from morning till the next day!! even in my sleep i couldnt stop laughing!! the picnic at Putrajaya Wetland is just what i needed.. a boost of self-esteem plus wads of positive energy!! All those laughter and fun... and the concerns later.. love you girls, and thanks a zillion for hearing me out.. the discussion we had on mother-in-laws, the tips mrs. shafi gave, the 'doa' for me.. i was deeply touched and moved.. and only God knows, how much i love you all... every single one of you, even if you were not there.. i know you'll wish me well too..

below piccies tells it all.. (courtesy of seri dhalila..i want a camera of my own..huhuhu)

after the picnic, i met iza.. my darling sharifah nurul iza.. i carefully planned my outstation get-away this time to ensure that i meet up with all those i love, and iza and lizza hademi are one of them.. due to some circumstances, i cannot meet lizza.. but we chatted on the phone.. and i met iza at alamanda.. seeing her is always pleasant.. knowing that she always cares, always there.. we catched up on each other in no time, and inviting strange stares from others in the Noodle Station due to our lesbian's act..ahahaha.. what?

later that night, we continued the madness at peon's wedding reception at pan pac, but i still have no piccies, have to wait for others to upload..buhuu.. at peon's i met halida!! long time no see her... all the other girls are the same since we left each other to meet the world 10 years ago.. how comforting!! the smiling faces, the peals of laughter, the 'gedikness..', the warmth of hugs and kissess... i felt at home..at peace with the world and myself.. i felt even more at home back at the hotel i shared with tote and fiejo.. hillarious..

and now, i'm back at telok ramunia.. back to the bundle of trouble i created and left behind.. but now i'm energized, mentally prepared.. and i will face it all.. when i feel like sinking, i'll cling to the sweet memories i had last weekend.. and i was deeply moved when i saw abang after almost 2 weeks of absence... he looks so tak terurus, with jambang dan janggut dah macam wolverine, the worried looks.. i'm sorry sayang if i hurt you so much.. and he was visibly relieved.. he told me he was relieved i came back to him, because it was his greatest fear if i ever left him... and i was.... speechless... i guess there is always someone who would love me for better or worse.... other than my dear friends..

to mr.fakhruz, (if you're reading this).. knowing you was one of the sweet memories i collected last weekend.. i had included you in my BFF list..muahahaaa.. gud luck to you in Penang, and do introduce me to your 'anak mami' when you had found the lucky girl...

my big day is just another 11 days away.. 11.. and the number will get smaller.. my doubts and fears.. mounting.. surfacing and subsiding, i guess cold feet really get the best of me.. im holding on, anticipating heart breaks and tears due to the "M.I.L" issues... but i will hold on, to the love we shared for almost 5 years.. and to the fact that i know i will be cushioned by my friends care and love all the way..

LET THE COUNTDOWN BEGIN....

adios,

xoxo

bedmate..

2008-12-18T08:42:00.002+08:00

one of the perks of getting married.. and one that's always been a teasing material to the newlyweds or bride/groom-to-be is having a new bedmate, :)
(and i'm looking forward... ahahhaha)

my current bedmates are okah & okid, every night without fail, they will jump on the bed to cuddle near me, okid loves to be under the blanket.. curling herself beside me, while okah prefers no blanket at all and sharing my pillow.. sometimes, in the middle of the night, he would sleep on my chest with his head tucked beside my neck..
i love sharing my bed with my kittens, and i wonder where to fit abang into the picture??

reading farina's entry last few days, about reminiscing old days.. i began to travel back to the most exciting years of my life.. back as a student in Seri Puteri.. every year, we had to change dorms and classes.. who determines the list and how they do it? i have no intention in that area.. what always excites me is getting a new bedmates and deskmate.. and i have fond memories of my list of bedmates & deskmates throughout the five years.. here they are

Form One:

- dorm; MERBUK. bedmate; Siti Yuhanis Ibrahim.. (anis rupanya..ehehee)
- class; 1 Ilmu. deskmate; Siti Rohaini Abd Ghani.. (eh both are siti's.. i only realized it now..)

Form Two:

- dorm; MERBUK. bedmate; Tengku Nurul Izza.. (kak syida paling anti aku ngan ko kan izza, hahah)
- class: 2 Usaha. deskmate; Sh. Wadeah Wafa.. (i love sleeping on her lap during school hours, sian ko wafa smpai lenguh kaki..)

Form Three:

- dorm; ENGGANG. bedmate; Shafizaliana Razali.. (aktiviti curik starter lampu..)
- class: 3 Usaha. deskmate; Siti Nurlina Zakaria.. (should i say more..???)

Form Four:

- dorm; before reshuffle: MERBUK. bedmate Tengku Nurul Iza (we're back!!)
after reshuffle: TEMPUA/KIAMBANG (official), TERATAI (non-official)
*i only slept at Kiambang, all my clothes and stuffs were at Teratai tapi dua² pun dorm jin bertendang
- class: 4 Ilmu. deskmate; Siti Rohaini Abd Ghani.. (reUNITED, with a class full of PM's.. sigh!!)

Form Five:

- dorm; MERAK??? yeah, a few months.. then back to ENGGANG. bedmate; Siti Rahmah a.k.a CTnang.. (sempena dugung Si Tenang.. )
- class: 5 Ilmu. deskmate; Siti Rohaini Abd Ghani.. after reshuffle, Hafizah Johar.. (way to go fiejo!! aku ingat detik² sebok menghafal lagu citer cinderella...)

abes dah.. i do hope i didn't get it wrong, ahahaha.. i dont really remember the names of the dorm's after it was change from its origin bird's names to those stupid flower's.. ahahaha (i never like it in flower's!!!)

btw, i went for dress fitting for sanding and nikah last weekend, but having trouble since i am fleshy.. ehheheheee.. penat dah aku menahan napas..

muahahahaha

adios,
xoxo

28 Muharram 1430 Hijrah

2008-12-16T08:58:00.003+08:00

i delayed this entry for quite a while.. reasons?

i feared that the same incident as my engagement date reoccured..

but Alhamdulillah.. looks like the date stay firm and God Willing.. i will be his on the night before...

YEAY!!! its my reception date!! the solemnization ceremony will take place the night before afer isya' prayer..

happy? nervous? i am happy, but not nervous.. just a lil' actually, after farina send the red code alarm.. only did i realized there's a lot to be done in such a short time!!!

all this while i'm helping mom for my siblings weddings, now its mine!!! then only i feel a lil' pressure.. and i am not good at handling one, no matter how miniature it is... sigh...

last sunday, me and mum went for wedding door gifts shopping.. sedang tertonggeng².. my big but bummed into someone and i stood up and said sorry to the lady behind me.. (nasib pompuan, kalau jantan...?@!!@$) and i said under my breath.. "eh macam eryn.." and the lady turned around immediately and voila! it is ERYNN a.k.a Hanniza Therina!!!!

what a reunion!! we exchanged phone number, have a small chat.. salam², hugs²... i did asked her where is erynn jr. since i remembered her being pregnant during our grand reunion last year.. she said her apprentice is downstairs with her mum... so we parted..

and i met her again downstairs.. this time with little ERYN JR.. her name is eryn too... (huahuahua...) and oh how soooooo adorable she is!!!! with her curly hair.. round face and eyes... and the most important thing.. she likes me!!! eryn said it is a miracle since she doesnt really like strangers...

will post again soon.. my workload is abundance..

adios,
xoxo

deepest gratitude..

2008-12-10T15:34:00.007+08:00

specially dedicated for my beloved friends;

~~farina, min & seri~~

for setting up the red code alarm signal to help me for my wedding costume.. aku terharu sebenarnye.. terima kasih...

"tanpa dirimu hidup tak bererti,
tahukah kau cinta ku murni,
jangan kau pergi,
dirimu
tiada ganti
harapan yang ada tersemat di jiwa...
semoga kau sentiasa....
di sisi...."

korang nyanyi la sendiri.. nak hire abang nuar mahal noo...
thanks a lot.... :)

adios,
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

happy anniversary girls!!!!

2008-12-05T08:33:00.002+08:00

my darling girls, sspians 95~99....

HAPPY 9th ANNIVERSARY!!

its been 9 years since we left the school.. and see how we thrive..
the bond we shared getting stronger despite of our distances now from one another..

may the upcoming years bring us more joy and happiness, as well as more cute little babies as our apprentices... muahahahaha....

I LOVE YOU ALL... i really do, ;)

adios,
xoxo

shop shop shop

2008-12-04T17:36:00.002+08:00

these few days, i had been on online window shopping ...

and i heart these blogs:

http://diaryofane-shopaholic.blogspot.com/

http://broughtwithlove.blogspot.com/

thought i share with you girls..

as i am in a rural area, online shopping kind of fits me.. plus it gives me another "curik-tulang" activity to do during office hours.. muahahaha

if anyone there who knows any interesting shopping blogs, do tell.. will you? ;)

adios,
xoxo
xoxo

huh?

2008-12-03T17:25:00.001+08:00

wanted, email, clubbing, Black, smoking, talk, walk, time...

wonder what they are??

click'n'see..

EXTRA², READ ALL ABOUT IT!!

2008-12-03T14:07:00.007+08:00

VAIO CR - VGN-CR353

am helping a friend by the name of DEBOB TREGEZUET to sell lappies of above model..

PRICE - RM2700 (installment accepted)

full specs? --> please leave me a msg

any questions? --> as above..hahaha...

i attached herewith pictures of available colours:

adios,

xoxo

Be A Kid Again

2008-12-03T13:57:00.003+08:00

i found this while surfing for a new template for my blog, it's kinda fun since i still do some of it, for me.. its good to keep the "kid" in you alive to help you realize the importance of being carefree.. but when the "kid" take over you, then you'll be never be taken seriuously.. :)

i highlighted those that i still do up to these days... muahahaha...

BE A KID AGAIN!!

1. Do a cartwheel.
2. Sing into your hairbrush.
3. Walk barefoot in wet grass.
4. Play a song you like really loud, over and over.
5. Dot all your “i”’s with smiley faces.
6. Read the funnies. Throw the rest of the paper away.
7. Dunk your cookies.
8. Play a game where you make up the rules as you go along.
9. Step carefully over sidewalk cracks.
10. Change into some play clothes.
11. Try to get someone to trade you a better sandwich.
12. Eat ice cream for breakfast.
13. Kiss a frog, just in case.
14. Blow the wrapper off a straw.
15. Have someone read you a story.
16. Find some pretty stones and save them.
17. Wear your favorite shirt with you favorite pants even if they don’t match.
18. Take a running jump over a big puddle.
19. Get someone to buy you something you really don’t need.
20. Hide your vegetables under your napkin.
21. Stay up past your bedtime. (like everyday?)
22. Eat dessert first.
23. Fuss a little, then take a nap.
24. Wear red gym shoes.
25. Put way too much sugar on your cereal.
26. Make cool screeching noises every time you turn a corner.
27. Giggle a lot for no reason. (just pretty recently, :) )
28. Give yourself a gold star for everything you do today.

so, which one are you?

adios,
xoxo

over excited..

2008-11-28T19:33:00.002+08:00

http://theexcitedbride.blogspot.com/

and this one too... a lot of nice things and great deals to be found..

http://elizaelies.fotopages.com/

hehehee...

adios,
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

wedding?

2008-11-28T10:05:00.013+08:00

i am now planning my own wedding, am i?

huahuahaua.. am being very cautious about this subject..

too fragile, too slippery..

pray for me people that i will be married by end of jan 09..

(there's too many drama already..huhu..)

i requested from my parents to manage the below list on my own, and they agreed.. but help me peeps.. i dont know what's good for me.. and really dont want to blew my big day after all that i've been through.. (our love story is sooooo full of obstacles,TRUST me.. everything in the list of problems there is)

1. colour baju nikah and sanding

2. theme pelamin

3. photographer

4. wedding cards

5. make-up

6. hantaran

especially the make-up, i dont want to end up looking like tepung gomak again, like i did during my engagement (sob sob)...

ainun nisa, sorry kak azie exploit gamba awak kat sini.. your choice of colour excites me.. and can i use this colour for my baju nikah?

and nisa, forgive me again.. your make-up stunned me.. farina darl.. can you make me look somewhat like this?

lina, is my wedding card design ready? you promised me a design which is "paling-cantik-dalam-dunia"...

i am listing down the songs for the wedding reception, usually mak abah pasang lagu² kawin orang melayu lama, but i wanted mine to be different.. (weddings in my family are normally simple and traditional, i wanted mine to be simple but not really traditional in a way)..

help me peeps.. give me suggestions, i can only think of a few now...

1. from this moment; shania twain

2. if i aint got you; alicia keys

3. ayat-ayat cinta; rossa

4. menanti sebuah jawaban; padi (ada makna lagu ni)

~~5. lelaki ini; anuar zain~~ farina says no, :)

6. ketulusan hati; anuar zain

7. sesuci cintamu; anuar zain

8. keabadian cinta; anuar zain

9. semua untukmu; anuar zain

~~10.fire; baby face~~ seri says no, :)

11. i dont want to miss a thing; aerosmith

12. segalanya; BYU

13. tentang seseorang; melly

14.mencintaimu; kris

15. ayu; V.E ---> thanx anis darl!!! (yang rod stewart tu aku kena dgr dulu..)

eh banyak la pulak.. eheheh (looks like i am anuar's fan, maybe i'll just invite him over to sing for me? can i fatma, farina, najmin, seri? (uuh ramai rupanya..)

since i am not staying with my mother, all the decisions are somehow will be solely mine.. and i am a well-known minah gelabah a.k.a nervous wreck!!

the date will be finalized next week i hope.. and the proposed date is end of jan.. if my dreams come true.. i'll faint.. seriously.. out of joy!!

darling friends, help me.. will you?

adios,

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo (dizzy)

im sorry

2008-11-27T11:10:00.003+08:00

please ignore my previous entry.. last week was draining and absolutely exhausting..

this is the explanation i owe:

~we had a crisis last weekend, and it got worse since he'd been avoiding all means to solve it, being emotional i am.. i posted that.. sorry, we are back on speaking terms now.. and trying to patch things up.. he admitted his mistakes and i admitted mine.. like the oldies say.."darah manis ni memang banyak dugaan"~

the company i work for, Ramunia Fabricators Sdn Bhd, is currently having financial problems which gets worse due to the terminated reverse take-over by MISC.. a shaky ground here, which gets worsen due to bad rumours(are there anything good about rumours?)

for the time being, i chose to stay..

being optimistic haa? it's just that fleeing away at this very moment is not wise either... i love working here, i sincerely do..i did complaints before, but who doesn't? i wish so hard that we will be right back on track and leave the red zone for good (which i think might take years to achieve)

one thing that gets on my nerves about all this issue is the rumours..oh how i hate rumours.. after the news of the terminated RTO, i have been observing people.. there are people who are excited about the news,but for all the wrong reasons.. they can now have sumthing juicier to gossip about which is an intelligent subject,(besides the normally lame news) spreading false updates, and talking as if they were not affected at all, and the best part is, saying things like "oh, we're so done.. oh Ramunia's going bankruptcy", and "we wont get our salary anymore..." DUH!! it sounds as if you're praying for THAT to happen, like HAAA???

there are people (like me, wink wink!!) who prefers to seek the truth, since i am in the Front End Div, info like this can comes handy and it is the TRUTH...
to fellow Ramunian's at heart, let us hold our hands together and pray...

i posted below some of what Ramunia's business since i know that some of you had never even heard of us..

i think that's about it for now.. will update again from time to time..
as for now, dont forget to watch PUAKA NIYANG RAPIK yang merepek² tonite!!!

adios,
xoxoxoxo

DAMN

2008-11-24T13:08:00.006+08:00

i was awake the whole night yesterday, thinking of calling the engagement off..

i want to call the engagement off..

i dont want to spend my entire life with you..

i am still thinking to call the engagement off...

ngaaaaaa

2008-11-19T08:34:00.003+08:00

i was having a bad morning yesterday, and as usual i spilled it out to abang..
during lunch break i tagged him along to the bank sebab sangat tak ada mood nak duk sorang²..

~~~L.U.N.C.H~~

am: ayu, ada nak gi mana2 ke, beli pape ke?

me: takla, ayu nak ikut abang je, nak duk ngan abang je, abang kan pengubat luka lara ayu..

~~~sampai kat bank~~

me: abang nak gi mana, abang kan pengubat luka ayu, jangan la gi.. (getik kan aku..)

am: luka mana boleh letak ubat selalu², tak baik nanti.. biar dia kering dulu..

me: ..speechless.. (looks like he mastered the skill to handle my "ngada-ngada melampau", hahahahaha.....BAGUS!!)

-----------------------------------------------------

i called a long lost friend to wish him happy birthday last monday.. and we had a good chat, he's getting married feb next year and i wish him well.. we had a lot of conflicts in our teenage years.. and a lot of stupid acts to complete the drama that i sincerely regret.. alhamdulillah.. as we get older, i think maturity makes us both forgave each other's mistakes and continue our friendship.. i really do treasure the friendship we had before the silly mistakes... to edy, selamat menjadi pengantin baru!!

my kelantan trip for adi's engagement with sayang = fun way to exercise..
since sume orang (mak, abah, along, angah, pak jang) balik after the event, tinggal la aku dan am tunggu bas malam pukul 8.... hem.. we discover kelantan by foot...
berjalan la pusing², dari pasar khadijah ke kb mall ke langgar.. naik bas, sapu² minyak kat kaki, tampal koyok..tido..zzzzzzzzzzzz.. seronot!!!

aaaa... ngantuk............
nak tido.. babai...

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

adios,
xoxozzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

ZHM..

2008-11-15T08:40:00.007+08:00

piccies: courtesy of farina.. (thanks darl)

ahh jantung jantung!!!

**dead**

adios,

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

a minute...

2008-11-12T20:49:00.002+08:00

i only asked for a minute...

a minute of your time to talk decently with you...

and i really meant just a minute, i know how busy you are.....

but a minute means nothing to you, or maybe the person requesting it...

simple as it is..but it hurts.....

and i only asked for a minute....

and the minute's now gone forever....

adios,
no xoxo

tagged..

2008-11-12T08:43:00.003+08:00

Dear Syuhai - here goes the tagging. (ooh azie tu aku, i tot orang len)

Tag 8 people:
Farina (ko kena buat jugak), Adrian, Tote, Min, Fatma, Hanin , Farah Lily, Tun Mahathir (aci tak, ahahah)

Describe yourself in one word:
Complicated

Who would you pick, someone who really loves you, or the one you love?:
Someone who really loves me

Have you ever loved someone before but never had the courage to tell him/her?:
No, i always do the chase.

How would you deal with a face to face rejection?:
If its serious relationship, i'll cry.. but if its not.. i pretend to be sad, and go have fun!!

God is giving you just 5 more minutes before going back to Heaven. IF you love someone special, what will you say to that person?:
Ayu jaga abang dari atas ye, sayang...

What would you say to a person who doesn't want to believe you?:
Lantak kau laa..

Was ever a time that you tried to learn to love someone?:
Yes, and it fails..miserably

What's your opinion about someone who's jealous?:
Obsessive jealousy - GET A LIFE..
Healthy jealousy - YOU'RE OK..

Do you have something special with you all the time?:
I do..

Best place to cry?:
On his shoulder..

Who do you love the most?:
They know who they are...

Tell us of your dream last night?:
On a weird vacation with adrian...

Ever hated someone so bad?:
YEAH! But not anymore... i forgave your stupidity..

The biggest and most hurtful lie you've heard?:
I LOVE YOU... BUT...

The last person you had a beer with?:
Can i change beer to teh 'o' ais limau? - SAYANGKU HAMDAN

The last person you went to the movies with?:
SAYANGKU HAMDAN & Deny

The last person you talked on the cell phone with?:
SAYANGKU HAMDAN (dont puke, bear with me..ahahah)

The last person you hugged?:
~~person~~ Cat : Okah & Okid

The last person you yelled at?:
~~person~~ Cat : Okah & Okid (im not a spinster with lots of cats, k!)

In the last week, have you kissed someone?:
Adrian. (freaky lesbo.. btw, its on the cheek)

Danced crazy?:
Eaaaaa... back in school years..

Think of the last time you were angry, why were you angry?:
Abang tak nak beli sate, dan lupa beli buah.. (we fought over the smalles things possible, :p)

If you could do anything, or wish anything, what would it be?:
I wanted a second chance.. to be more respectful towards myself...

If you could have an all expense paid trip, where will you go?:
Around the world??

Would you or have you ever blackmailed someone?:
In the most subtle but cruel way..

Are you old fashioned?:
Sumtimes..

What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back?:
NONE. I tell the truth...

What would be the hardest thing for you to give up on?:
SAYANGKU HAMDAN

Five facts about me:
I : am so full of emotions
: take responsibilites very seriously
: do not tolerate nonsense
: laugh a lot when im happy
: love my friends eventhough they're far away

Five things that scare me:
1. Creepy Crawling or Flying Insects (Top of the list - Cockroach)
2. Chronic diseases
3. Losing loved ones
4. No MONEY
5. Ghosts

Two songs playing in my head lately:
Menjaga hati - Yuvie & Nuno
Take a bow - Rihanna

Five things I treasure in my life:
LOVE, HEALTH, WEALTH, FRIENDSHIP, PEACE

adios,
xoxo

cuppies!!

2008-11-11T16:19:00.005+08:00

alo aloha..

while google-ing my name yesterday, i found this!!

and im so pleased..

ehehee.. so does he..

while browsing more and more, i thought i see these yummies sumwhere..

and yeah im right!!

so i decided to frequent this blog, due to the above and the yummies are SUPERBLY DELICIOUS!! trust me, i ate them!!

to along yang order all these saturated fat, THANK YOU!!

adios,

xoxo

no idea

2008-11-11T15:10:00.005+08:00

alo aloha..

i changed the layout today.. i do realize that the previous layout was a little bit unfriendly, and childish..wuahahah.. (forgive the first timer experience).. i did accidentally deleted a few of my older entries (huhuhuhuuu)

i spent almost the whole working hours today getting this done, and the next wud be updating my long forgotten FS and FB..

aku tak keje ke? keje.. tapi kasik laa rilek sket, tender baru submit maa.. lembu pun tau penat... (sape berani cakap kat bos dia gini?)

my lil bro is getting engaged this weekend so off we go to Kelantan Darul Naim.. hoping that it wont rain this Sunday, may the sun shine as bright as my brother's hopes and dreams..

last weekend, i attended the required "kursus pra-perkhawinan", was very exhausted since i just arrived the previous night from kl, demi sijil itu.. ku gagahkan jua..
the input i get = priceless..
ada satu perkara yang ustaz tu sebut which i wanted to share:

"Barangsiapa yang meruntuhkan rumah tangga orang lain, Allah akan runtuhkan rumah tangga nya"

since i do have lots of friends who dates married man, please girls... jangan anggap apa awak buat tu tak salah, kalau orang tu jujur dan tulus, he wont hide you from his wife.. kalau sekarang pun awak bleh nampak yang dia dah tak tanggungjwab dengan adil, (do not lie to yourself), what makes you think he'll change for you.. and to my friend who actually married the man tapi sekarang merana kerana hubby nye cari 3rd wife which is undoubtedly younger and prettier, sabarla.. anggap ni pembalasan dunia atas apa ko buat pada wife 1st dia.. (sorry to say this)

im not perfect myself, i nearly got myself in this kind of mess too once, tapi masih ada ruang dan peluang pada semua orang untuk perbetulkan kesalahan sendiri, susah.. memang susah.. tapi kalau awak dah tau depan tu jalan mati.. kenapa teruskan jugak, lagi lambat awak berenti, lagi lama lah perjalanan balik...

to farina: i envy your pics with ZHM, and no matter how i wish, i still cannot turn back time to attend the press release of Impak Maksima the Musical..sob² & lets google other's names and published what we get!! (haha)

to peonate & ayentzl: happy birthday!! a year older a year wiser (may this come true)

adios,
xoxo

ola part 2

2008-11-04T14:12:00.003+08:00

as i was chatting to najmin yesterday, i remembered one incident that i had intended to write down in my blog but forgotten...

5. caught red-handed
- to those who knew, they'll know that my bos is stationed in kl and here in ramunia we "can work with minimal supervision" (ayat normal dalam resume)
- they will also know that i usually sleep on my bos's room couch when i feel lazy (which is rare, trust me)
- one fine day, feeling the blues.. i decided to take a nap, tengok line clear.. couch tu pun kosong (bukan aku sorang je eaaa,semua..) aku pun masuk laa...
- nak bukak air-con..cam sejuk je tak jadi laa..
- baru je.. baru sangat aku nak landing.. baru nak menonggeng.. kreok...
- there he was.. my beloved bos..
- ...............................................................................
- ..............................................................................
- azhe: eheheee.. sory sory che den, sya ingat che den kat kl, sory ye (sipu2 malu, aku kuar)
- i did not remember what he said, or his expressions.. (or maybe aku dah tak bleh dengar, telinga aku dah berdesing..dan mata aku dah kabur)
- smpai sekarang, aku tak tido lagi dah atas sofa tu..

6. memories as an announcer..
- aku teringat mende ni tadi, my partner was tote a.k.a lina
- di satu petang, hujan renyai².. duty cam biasa..
- tiba².. tersembul satu kepala dari belakang dinding tepi pintu..
- dengan rambut tajam2 yang kat hujung² dia ada titis² air hujan bergantung...
- titis air hujan tu kaler kelabu² sket sebab mungkin dah mixed ngan minyak rambut..
- muka toye dan selamba, "bleh tolong panggil A**a* tak, form 5.." dan dia hilang...
- the minute he's gone, aku pandang tote, tote pandang aku... dan bersembur la gelak ngilai²
- dan satu masalah dah timbul, sape nak announce, ketawa tak bleh berenti ni..
- kalau tengah announce tergelak nanti kena marah..
- to cut it short.. sakit paru2 aku announce sambil tahan gelak, tapi tak berjaya jgak laa sebab tersembur gak akhir² ayat..
- aku tak tau apa yang lucu sangat, zaman sekolah dulu, semua pun seronok.. aku ingat first time aku tengok g-string ngan tote dan seri kat the mall
- gelak sampai tak cukup nafas, aku ingat lutut aku lembik sampai tak bleh jalan.. and seriouly aku merangkak.. (dulu² bukan ramai pun orang kat the mall)
- akak sales girl tu pun gelak.. mungkin gelak pada reaction kitorang pada mende alah tu yang sekarang dah tak ada makna lagi dah..

aku rindu my girls, jauh mana pun terpisah, lama la macam mana pun.. kalau aku susah diorang sentiasa ada.. masa aku down dulu tahun 2 kat u, weeza, seri, tote, min.. thanks a lot.. dan paling aku hargai, fijo call aku dari uk.. aku nak korang tau aku juga ada untuk korang wherever, whenever.. may Allah bless all of you always... muah muah muah!!!

adios,
xoxo

perasaan amarah

2008-11-01T11:34:00.003+08:00

yes i am very angry with you..

i am very frustrated with you..

after all this years, you never know how to actually soothe me...

i am dissapointed in your way of solving problems that we had..

i feel a tint of regret being in a relationship with you which nowadays seems so dull and stucked
(which i do not even realize when we are ok)

i am tired of trying to ensure that our paths are crossed daily and maintaining an open and healthy communication

i am so exhausted to be everything that you ever wanted while not getting anything back in return

do i hate you?
yes i do

i really do

i hate you.

need to say more?

yes, i really do hate you

adios,
no xoxo

ola!!

2008-10-30T11:03:00.005+08:00

whoa..quite some time since i last wrote.. couldn't find the time to do it.... actually, sekarang pun still busy, tapi since aku kat kl hq and the pc i shud be using is blocked by it dept and adrian's away to sumplace, aku decide nak "tumpang guna" pc dia jap..

arrived at kl at 2.oo am last nite and since we have no choice left, decided to stay at the Leo Palace Hotel.. the place is ok, but a piercing women's scream and kids giggling laughter woke me up last nite.. ada hantos ka? but i was too tired to care, just plead that they do not come into my room..

there are a few things occured in the last few weeks since my last entry, which i made a mental note to jot down....

1. My New House
- i wish i have piccies to upload, since i really adore my new house...
- and 0-0 loves it too, their playing space is thrice the size it was before
- only 1 thing that scares me, the pile of kayu-kayu lama behind the house, which happened to be the natural habitat of the scaly reptiles, snakes.. (i soothe down my paranoia by sprinkling sulphur a.k.a belerang around the house)

2. My first raya guests at the new house
- happened to be 2 boys around the age of 10-11
- on a SUNDAY morning, haloooo
- i was still in bed, i thought it was my neighbour's son sending me breakfast, eheheheh
- assalamualaikum..assalamualaikum... nak raya... (brings me back to reality)
- i did not even let them in; "akak duduk sorang la dik, baru pindah ni haa.. akak bagi duit raya je laa ea'
- haha.. i bought them with money, feeling bad.. i decided to give them a little extra.. Rm2 each
(all in coins, since the smallest change i have is Rm10)
- i have to forked out almost all of my "Sens saves lives - MAKNA" tabung to make up the Rm4 i decided to give
- after i closed the door, they stayed in front of the house, loudly counting the money i gave.. "seposen tiga posen lima posen....." (bertuah punya budak)
- that evening... as i was cleaning out my cats litter box. i heard a faint sound of assalamualaikum.. then it gets louder.. dalam hati, "mak aih.. ramai nye kat luar tuh..alamak!! ni mesti kes aku kasik Rm2 dah tersebar satu kampung"
- my decision, i stayed put silent as a mouse, praying that they leave soon.. ahahahah (aku dah tak ada duit raya nak kasik!!)
- with the tv on, they did not budge easily.. after about 10 minutes of assalamualaikum, nak raya (which gradually turning to angry notes) they finally leave... (ya ampun budak2)

3. Mak, abah and atuk's visit
- they paid me a visit last deepavali holiday..
- and when they leave, my house is upgraded!!
- ehehheee.. lets just say, casa impian's team serang rumah aku and changed almost everything..
- curtains, lighting, furnitures, pinggan mangkuk, and the list goes on..
- TERIMA KASIH MAK, ABAH, ATUK!!
- in return, i brought them to visit the "crocodile farm" at telok sengat
- the outcome = hillarious (abah ngan aku baling batu kat buaya ni.. dont worry, kulit dia tebal and the stones are small, why.. because we want to see croc's in action, results = extremely successful, mandi air buaya kitorang kena simbah..)

4. keje..keje..keje
- a new tender is on hand now
- tapi drawing dia amatlah kecil.. which calls for magnifying glass..
- sakit kepala aku plus pedih mata
- but i do feel like a museum curator.. studying over a piece of ancient drawing (huahauhauhaua)

seems like that is all i can remember for now, my mental's storage capacity needs upgrading.. but who cares.. hahahaaaa... adrian pun dah nak tiba balik ke meje nye selepas puas berjalan ke dept orang len..

haa.. happy birthday to siti nurlina a.k.a tote and seri!!!!
may god bless you both and bless me even more, ahahahaaa...
semoga hidup korang dipermudahkan dalam segala urusan...amin..
and most importantly, may we stay friends for thousands years to come..

heehehe..
adios,
xoxo

moi pride & joy

2008-10-07T08:17:00.004+08:00

okah okid

the love of my life.. i adore them both "very the very the much"

eheeheee...

people's first reaction when i gave them these piccies:

seri: kucing jenis apa ni?

najmin: telinga betul ea..

kak shidah: kenapa telinga dia camtu?

angah: woo astro nye kucing ko

abang: macam kucing firaun kan (ni yang paling zalim, sampai hati abang!!)

atok mak: ni kucing hutan ni

adi: kucing hutan la ni de

ali: macam kucing hutan

mak: capang nye

pape pun, i love them.. so much.. thanks for bringing so much joy into my life..

adios,
xoxo

finally..

2008-09-25T17:25:00.003+08:00

akhirnya.. dah nak sampai pun, hari last bekerja sebelum cuti beraya.. ho yeah ho yeah!!!

i went for a niosh-osfam safety course today, the one that i've been avoiding for a year.. and was already out-of-excuses-not-to-go.. the course was nothing scary or what so ever, im just plain lazy, my brain shut down automatically for any events academically over this last few years..
senang cakap, aku malas yang AMAT, ya ampun...

dah abes pun, tammat sudah.. harapnye aku lulus le ujian tu, i dont want to be near any test again until renewal time 2 years ahead!! except test HIV nak kawin tu, haa tat i like!!!!

went for breakfast at Damai last nite, followed by pool and table tennis matches between the guys, the girls went around the hotel compound, taking piccies, me? slouched over the couch, too lazy to move my butt, ahahahaahaha..

later that nite, we went to the "haunted mansion" yang tobat aku takkan gi kalau bukan bulan pose, untuk main merocun.. cantik.. akak suka.. eventhough sakit pale dongak, tapi akak suka jugak.. (baca "akak" ala² sengau, baru ko tau betapa sukanya aku, ahahahaah)

dah nak raya pun ni, pas ni tak ada ke masa nye aku nak update2 blog sampai raya ni, melengking sore mak aku naik ke langit, keje banyak dooooo.. ni ler, jadik anak pompuan belum kawin, akak ipar aku tengah lembek muntah² bawak budak, along raya rumah mentua, sape yang tinggal.. akak jugak...takpe.. aku redha.. (bukan susah pun nak rebus ketupat ngan lemang segera, wakakakaka)

oleh itu, selamat hari raya aidilfitri to all, maaf setulus²nya.. apa saje, harap dimaafkan..
be extra careful on the road and anywhere.. to maintain the happy festive mood among loved ones.. makan la banyak², yang gemuk ko bukan aku.. ahahahahahahah

dalam suka ni, mesti ada yang sedih kan, sebab tu kita tak bleh suka sangat², kena man-man, sedih pun tak bleh sedih sangat, kena bawak bersabar.. wasatiah.. sifat mahmudah ni.. tak tau apa? tengok le balik buku Pendidikan Islam sekolah menengah dulu, dah tak ada? aku ada fon num ustazah umi, amek kat farina ritu, ada berani?? ahahahahahha..

tata titi tutu chow sin ci

adios,
xoxo

its been a while

2008-09-22T13:32:00.004+08:00

salam.,

its been a while dah since i last updated, and a few interesting events had occured during last week.. besides the normal break-fast event here and there.. there's this one particular occasion yang meninggalkan sedikit kesan di hati.. membuatkan aku rasa bertuah nye duduk di bumi Malaysia yang diberkati.. patriotik la kan.. tak salah pun, aku bukan PATI, ehehehehh...

simple je apa yang berlaku, temankan abang for a hair cut, at a small, simple and traditional barber shop... is to be expected since kat ramunia ni, all things traditional seems preserved.. and i began to appreciate that.. the shop owner is a chinese man, which happened to be a relatives to abang who do have chinese ancestors..since there was no other customer in the shop, we did have a small talk, he introduced me as his fiancee, (like music to my ears., :p) and etc.etc.
this chinese man is ancient, and he speaks malays fluently.. then it strucked me to realize that we have no language barriers, no matter how different we are.. and we are actually living harmoniously.. serving one another on our basic needs and stuffs.. i feel blessed and thankful to God.. Malaysia is a peaceful country after all, simply by comparing it to her neighbours..

another service offered at the barber shop is "korek telinga".. this was fun, since i never witnessed any before.. at first cam takut gak aa tengok alat2 yang dikuarkan, all those pointy metal and sticks..ehehee.. my first thought when i saw those tools.. is it clean? to my relief it was steriled, ok... orang lama pun tau kepentingan sterilization ni.. one of his equipment yang sangat mencuit hati aku ialah, the most important of all, torchlight.. which is strapped on a microphone stand with a duct tape, ehehehehe... he claimed that the torchlight on the stand had serviced him for more than 30 years already and never fails..

memang bersih kilat la telinga abang, and his hearing ability increases!!! good.. i wished i had my k800 that time, to capture the moment, tapi i just have to keep it in memory for the mo until abang's next visit.. i want to bring a camera for sure!! simple things, big impacts, maybe just for me, but i am grateful for that.. nyehnyeh..

about 3 nights ago, as i was driving home from office, an animal crossed the road in front my car.. no ordinary road kill victims, this one can get me killed.. be prepared for an armadillo!!!

yes, no kidding, an armadillo crossed the road, and judging from its size, memang kereta aku bleh terbalik kalau aku langgar je mamat tu, kulit dia ni keras, paling² pun dia curled up jadik bola je.. aku nekad je swerve to the right and expecting to hear a loud thump, tapi alhamdulillah, my action was timely, and it saved us both.. and you know what comes out from my mouth when i first saw that mamat.. "armadillo..armadillo..armadillo..armadillo" repeatedly like possesed.. i was so shocked sampai aku dah tak bleh cakap melayu dah..ahahahaha.. and how i laughed after the incident... relieved and thankful mixed..

oh ye, im moving to a new house lepas raya ni, dan aku sangat berpuas hati dengan rumah ini, a kampung house, separuh papan separuh kayu, sangat luas.. sangat.. dan kawasan halaman yang sangat luas.. dengan pokok² bunga, pokok ru, buaian.. what heaven!! dulu amy ngan nuar duduk sini, tapi nuar dapat keje kat technip so im seizing the opportunity.. dan luck is on my side!! dapat la aku sambung sewa diorang.. it cost me an extra hundred permonth dari sekarang, tapi dengan rumah yang sebegitu indah dan jarak yang sangat dekat dengan ofis, aku terima dengan hati penuh bunga², ALHAMDULILLAH... so i guess i'll not be seeing any armadillo again.. fuuhh...

already in festive mood, not so motivated to do office works.. to my dear friend seri.. aku hanya boleh cakap, tapi ko yang rasa, dan aku bleh faham apa ko rasa.. sabar la ye sayangku.. aku jauh dari ko tapi aku ada je kalau ko need a shoulder to cry on, i wont judge you at all.. it DOES hurts so much to be away from the one you loved, tapi this wont distance you both.. it will only makes the heart grows fonder.. sabar la ye seri ku sayang...

adios,
xoxo

hari² sengal..

2008-09-12T16:16:00.004+08:00

sengal.. tapi bukan aku...

ada mamat sorang ni, huhuuu.. pasal keje part time ni la, yes i know im sending email that to some people wud consider as spam.. tak pela, awak tak suka delete laa..

why take the effort to reply, and replying it to ALL in the list.. semata² nak cakap aku gi jahanam..huhuhuuu.. kalau 40 orang baca, 40 orang la cakap aku gi jahanam... sedih kan tu...

huhuu, takpe la i did not keep grduges, biasala perangai manusia mcam², satu je pegangan aku, kalau aku ditipu, atau menipu, terlepas di dunia mungkin selamat, tapi janji ALLAH di padang mashar tetap tak terlepas, terpulangla pada orang nak cakap apa, hak masing² punye mulut..

eheheeheh, kelakar pun ada gak.. akak opes aku gelak gila.. it is very funny, she claimed.. yang sedikit sebanyak melegakan hati aku jugak laa..ehehehe thanks to you, kak shidah!!!

pagi tadi, on my way to the office, aku passed by a school.. aku tengok sume student dia kat kantin, reading.. and it brought back a sweet memories back to my schooling years at SSP, 0700 to 0720 is supposed to be Reading Programme, tapi for me and a few others, yang pastinya tote.. hari isnin je ia akan jadi Buat-Nametag-Dari-Kertas-Plus-Asking-Around-Sape-Ada-Badge-Lebih-Programme, i cannot remember reading anything during that 20 mins period at all.. mungkin ada la, bila hari tu ada test, atau exam week.. other than that, i wonder apa aku and the rest of the "basketball-court-circle-group" a.k.a my geng buat masa tu... hemm...

dah 1630, nak kena balik dah ni... aku masak tau bukak pose, do not under estimate me, and my cooking, aku tak adala kasik orang lain makan, aku je makan, tapi aku masih lagi hidup dan bernafas dengan sehat ni maknanya i am capable of cooking without killing anyone, good azie!!

selamat berbuka, jangan makan banyak sangat, nanti ruku' semayang tertonggeng plak, perut berat!!

adios,
xoxo

minggu mengumpul kesabaran

2008-09-11T10:18:00.007+08:00

recently, aku ada sedikit ketidakpuasan hati ngan seorang hamba Allah..
satu ayat je aku nak cakap kat dia, (but I never will, tak nak carik gaduh bulan pose ni)

"ACT YOUR AGE"

tolong la seriously!!! aku dah tak tahan nak tengok perangai ko yang sentiasa berlagak cam ko hypp sangat!! sedangkan, you do look your age, tak ada sekilas pun air muka ko nampak ko muda.. so PLEASE!!! ACT YOUR AGE!!! its EMBARASSING!!..

phew.. l.e.g.a...

ada lagi seorang hamba ALLAH..
ayat aku nak cakap kat dia ialah,

"LOOK AROUND YOU, ORANG DAH MENGATA BANYAK, AKU DAH PENAT TEGUR KO SUGAR COATED, TOLONGLA COME BACK DOWN TO EARTH, ORANG DAH PENAT NAK MELAYAN MASALAH YANG KO CIPTA SENDIRI"

phew phew... double L.E.G.A...

tapi sebenarnya tak la lega sangat, aku rasa that particular person pun tak tau aku tuju kat dia, ehheeheh.... tapi takpela.. Ya ALLAH, Kuatkan la hati aku menghadap kerenah umat Mu yang pelbagai ini... AMIN..

life is GREAT macam mana pun, with OKAH n OKID, even BETTER!!
sekarang dah manja lebih², dah aku layankan..eheheeh
i can get along dengan lebih baik lagi sekarang dengan family abang..aku harap bleh betul² fit in..
bisnes pun Alhamdulillah, so far so good, and so does my part time..
belajar WASATIAH.. itu penting dalam dunia sekarang yang penuh dengan ekstremis, fanatics, dan penuh ke"over"an.. b-a-c-k-2-b-a-s-i-c-s..

cuti raya dah approved!! oh yeah, eventhough ada satu je hari aku kena fake kan sakit, ehehehee
lama tu nyah, mak nak cuti.. haaa jaga nko!!!
mungkin.. ini raya terakhir aku as single kot.. apsal aku ada rasa sedeh...

aku rindu tote laa..opss lina.. dah lama tak mengarut ngan ko la tote.. opss lina..
sejak fon aku hilang ritu, kurang dah call ko, kalau tak bil fon aku tak ada la number orang lain..

lina oh lina.. my partner in almost everything, you name it.. crime, bisnes, love, laugh, tears, jerks, dorks, etc etc etc....

adios,

xoxo

munajat seorang hamba

2008-09-06T10:21:00.004+08:00

a song touched my heart today... betapa agungnya kuasa Tuhan,
masih boleh lagi menerima hambaNya yang tak pernah lekang dari melakukan dosa..
sekiranya hambaNya ingin kembali..

~~~~~~~~~
Munajat Seorang Hamba
Artist: Hijjaz
Album: Cahya Ilahi
Song Category: Nasyid

Dikala malam sunyi sepi
Bani insan tenggelam dalam mimpi
Musafir yang malang ini pergi membasuh diri
Untuk mengadap-Mu oh Tuhan

Lemah lutut ku berdiri
Di hadapan mu tangisanku keharuan
Hamba yang lemah serta hina
Engkau terima jua mendekati
Bersimpuh dibawah duli kebesaran-Mu

Tuhan hamba belum pasti
Bagaimana penerimaan-Mu
Dikala mendengar pengaduanku
Ku yakin Kau tak mungkiri
Dalam wahyu yang Kau nuzulkan
Kau berjanji menerima pengaduanku
Dan Kau berjanji sudi mengampunkan ku
Dari segala dosa yang ku lakukan

Ampunan-Mu Tuhan
Lebih besar dari kesalahan insan
Hamba yakin pada keampunan-Mu Tuhan
Bukan tidak redha dengan ujian
Cuma hendak mengadu pada-Mu
Tempat hamba kembali nanti di sana

~~~~~~~

aku selalu rasa macam ni, diterima ke amalan aku, usaha aku.. sebab aku dah banyak buat silap..
tapi.. syurga dan neraka tu kan Allah yang punya.. hanya DIA yang boleh tentukan ke mana akhirnya kita.. dan aku yakin pada kasih dan cintaNYA...
tetapkan hati ku kepadaMU Ya Allah...

i add this song and some few others in my imeem list,
h.a.p.p.y LISTENING!!

adios,
xoxo

bulan ramadhan...

2008-09-04T14:03:00.003+08:00

selamat berpuasa buat sume..

in this holy month of RAMADHAN, aku nak kurangkan bercakap,
lagi banyak bercakap lagi banyak yang tak bermanfaat aku cakap...
lagi banyak tak bermanfaat, lagi banyak kesilapan...
lagi banyak kesilapan nanti lagi banyak la dosa...
cukupla dengan dosa² aku yang selama ni dah terlalu banyak...
huhuhuuu...

bulan ramadhan ni jugak, aku nak belaja sebaik mungkin untuk menjadi mutiara tulen..
tak mo dah yang tiruan, celup² ngan plastik... aku rasa dah lebih dari sampai masa pun...
ikhlas dari hati aku, lebih lama aku berusaha mendalami agama yang aku anuti dari lahir ni...
lagi tenteram hati aku, lagi kurang amarah aku... dan aku sememangnye terkenal dengan sifat pemarah dan cepat melenting...
aku tak bleh janjikan aku akan terus berubah dan kekal selamanya, aku harap begitulah..
tapi yang utama kat sini, aku nak berusaha....

from amieheidi jugak aku ada baca yang bukan lelaki sahaje kena menjaga pandangan, perempuan juga.. :)
nampaknye lepas ni, aku kena la turunkan pandangan dari pandang anak² ikan mantap² yang sememangnye bersepah di yard ni (eish payah ni) .. tapi kalau terpandang, sekali tu rezeki.. :)

dalam minggu² terakhir sebelum puasa ni, aku banyak diuji.. kawan² rapat dan family aku ada yang sampai risau, kenapa malang bertimpa kat aku ni.. mula dengan henset aku yang hilang.. cuai, aku letak atas bumbung kete waktu borak² ngan kawan dan kemudian aku lupa nak amek, sebenarnya waktu letak henset tu atas kete tu dalam hati aku dah terdetik yang aku akan lupa henset ni dan akan hilang, tapi besar kuasa tuhan, dah ditakdirkan bukan rezeki aku lagi k800 tu, aku letak jugak.. aku halalkan la pada siapa yang jumpa tu, anggapla tu zakat harta dari aku.. (ayat² orang yang cuba untuk redha)

pastu sehari sebelum merdeka ritu plak, aku pi parking kete kat depan opes, ntah la apa kena aku, kete dah berhenti, tapi kaki aku macam di luar kawalan gi tekan pedal minyak kuat² (kete auto maa), apa lagi, terngiang² la bunyi dentuman yang memecah hening pagi pukul 8 di yard b telok ramunia, ehehehe.. aku langgar dinding opes maaa, dah la dinding opes aku besi, akibatnye.. main jonkang-jongket la bonet aku, bumper pun lekuk cam dah bleh takung air, alhamdulillah lampu depan tak pecah, dan yang paling aku bersyukur, aku tak apa².. walaupun kuat hentaman tu, aku sehat je.. cat aku seb baek tak tanggal kat bonet tu sebab ada pasang bendera, JALUR GEMILANG saved my car paint!! eheheeheh, aku cam terkejut beruk laa, tapi kalau aku jadik beruk pun tak guna gak, tak bleh reverse balik pun, jadi aku pun anggap la itu balasan tuhan cash bagi kat aku sbab aku cakap kete waja putih kat simpang tadi tu bodoh, masuk tak bagi signal.. dan sebenarnye kalau pagi² gi keje tu, aku selalu menaikkan darah orang dengan skill drive dah lambat nak masuk keje aku tu... ni sume balasan hasil sumpahan orang² kampung yang aku dah kumpul hari²... alhamdulillah aku masih boleh bernafas dengan jayanya hingga kini... tobat tak buat dah!!!

ntah apa la terjal sangat aku ni, dari start akil baligh sampai la ke laa, aku ni tak pernah nye nak dapat semayang terawikh tu buat penuh kecuali time cuti umum tu laa.. ada je alasan aku, dah nama pun alasan, banyak je idea aku menciptanya, tapi tahun ni, aku nak cuba... selagi termampu dan terdaya, aku nak buat jugak semayang terawikh ni.. kalau pikir balik pun, tak buat terawikh buat apa je time tu, tengok tv? shopping? tu sepanjang tahun pun bleh buat.. tapi terawikh ni, bulan ni je... sekali ni je setahun..hemm motivasi diri, renung² kan dan selamat beramal!!!

pada kawan² aku yang tak abes² nak berdebat politik tu, kurang²kan la.. berhati-hati dalam pertuturan, nak debat punya pasal pun... ingat la kerana sesungguhnya yang hak dan yang batil itu hanya Allah yang mengetahui apa yang disembunyikan.. janji DIA di akhirat itu kekal benar, terlepas kat dunia, akhirat tak ada jalan keluarnya... apa² sekalipun, kita orang ISLAM, ada agama yang lengkap, balik la pada ISLAM, mesti ada penyelesaiannya.. (mesti ada orang nak cakap aku sokong PAS la tu) terpulang laa, hati masing², lu ngan tuhan je yang tau.. yang penting, UNDI ANDA ADALAH RAHSIA!!! hahahahaha :p

eheheheeh.. aku plak lagi banyak bercakap, kata nak kurangkan, huh...
kalau ada aku tersinggung sape², aku mintak maaf banyak².. bukan niat aku..
blog ni macam online diary aku jee, tak ada kepentingan pada sape²..eheheheh

hari ni nak buka pose apa ea???

adios,

xoxo

~~ a dual celebration

2008-08-29T18:21:00.006+08:00

its been a while huh.. i am quite busy sekrang ni.. carik duit lebih, nak kawin, nak raya.. :)

im selling kurma madu Yussof Taiyuub now, and some raya cookies.. (ada satu papan with 16 samples), nak beli ke?? :)

besides that, im doing a part time job on the net, which requires me to send mass emails inviting people to do this part time...

this is NOT A SCAM, because my opes mate dah dapat duit pun, and it actually requires us to work.. NO FREE MONEY, but then, to those who laugh at me, its oke.. it hurts but its oke..

to those people who received my email, i do hope you can reply accordingly, because only by you replying to the email PROPERLY, i will be PAID, not much just 40cents per email.. if you're not interested, I HOPE YOU CAN REPLY IT TOO.. then you can just simply ignore the email my "online-boss" sent you, but you had already CONTRIBUTED 40CENTS TO ME, :)

but then, everything is still up to you.. hehe, to my dear friends and families, THANKS A LOT FOR SUPPORTING ME!!! it means so much even its just so small an amount... if i failed to repay you, you know that GOD WILL.. and HE NEVER FAILS.

to all MALAYSIANS, HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!!!!!
the freedom we enjoy today mungkin tak ada makna besar sangat to our generation but try to visualize us in a war, like IRAQ, or BOSNIA.. which na'uzubillah, but not impossible at all.. what with our current POLITICS SITUATION!! not so hard to imagine after all!!

to all MUSLIMS, SELAMAT MENYAMBUT RAMADHAN!!!
dalam kegembiraan berkonsert malam merdeka tu, jerit² tengok bunga api, kalau boleh sebelum tu makmurkan la masjid bersolat sunat terawikh, barulah merdeka itu penuh makna, ramadhan itu terasa rahmatnya.. janganlah dikejarkan dunia sahaja sedangkan semua tahu dalam sekeras² kepala otak pun yang mati itu pasti dan akhirat itu kekal selamanya... peringatan untuk aku ni haa sendiri dan semua... semoga keberkatan RAMADHAN yang mulia ini melimpah ruah kepada semua yang mencarinya... ANDAI KAU TAHU INI RAMADHAN TERAKHIR MU... what will you do?

im going back to kuantan tomorrow after work with OKAH n OKID!! wish us LUCK!!! badly needed it!!! eheheeh... ouh yaa forgot, i took o-o to vet today, biasala budak², kena amek injection monthly, eheheehee...

till then dear friends...

adios,
xoxo

aku mulut besa?? (abang mesti setuju.. :P)

2008-08-26T10:55:00.002+08:00

kebosanan melanda diri..aku melayan mende2 alah kat blogthings ni..

Your Mouth is a Little Big

You're not a total tell all, but you don't hide who you are either.

You've struck a good balance between discretion and sharing.

People know you fairly well, at least on a superficial level.

But you save your most revealing secrets for your best friend... or no one!

Do You Have a Big Mouth?

~~Singa, I am.. nah, not really...

2008-08-26T10:44:00.002+08:00

You are 67% Leo

konvoi lagi..

2008-08-25T16:52:00.006+08:00

kami yang suka berkonvoi!!!

ehehe,actually abang does, and his friends.. the LPC team to be exact..
i am one of them, so aku layankan ajeeeeeeee....

previous week, LPC was invited to join a launching event for an insurance company named Steerage sumthing2, lebeh kurang aa.. e-hayat is the name, but we called it e-mayat..ahahahahaa...

aktiviti dia? apa lagi.. konvoi laa..mengiringi artis jemputan, which was arry putra.. who? yeah i dont even know him.. the rest of us pun tak tahu menahu siapakah makhluk ini.. we came not for him though,just for the fun of konvoi..ahahahah.. tapi we (me and am) did not wait till the function is over..

we had other obligations to succumb to..

next konvoi...happened yesterday by the theme of "INDEPENDENCE DAY" which we named ~~LEDAKAN MERDEKA 51~~

HAHAHA, i do think i look really-good in the pic to your right.. ahahhaha... kamera jamali bagusssss laa... buat orang nampak cantik dan kurus... beli kat mana?? SAYA SUKAAAAAA

(masuk bakul angkat sendiri is sumtimes gud for your own self-esteem)

aktiviti? lagi2 konvoi, lagi2 konvoi.. dah nama kelab kete kan.. we do what we're soooo gud at..

M.E.N.C.A.P.U.B

we ended the konvoi at Maliessa Resort where we ate, played games,take more piccies, gelak2, guling2, eratkan silaturrahim and etc..

in spite of all that fun.. we made sure that we do not forget our creator, Allah S.W.T... tak sesiapa dibenarkan tuang2 solat aa.. to summ it all.. WE LAUGHED A LOT.. and thankfull to GOD for blessing us with a peacefull country to live in...

adios,

xoxo

~~hari jadi

2008-08-21T15:24:00.003+08:00

its my birthday today... shud be sumthing to be remembered ain't it.. but i wish to forget every single moment... except all those warm pleasant wishes from family and friends...

a day that i do not want to treasure, i do not want to remember.. it hasnt ended yet, but i just cant barely take any anymore...

aku tak tau macamana nak luahkan.. i dont know what word fits.. the pain, the frustration..
being a "sponge-hearted" i am..i know i'll get over this by tomorrow... but deep down it resides, and accumulates untill it finally hardened the "sponge"...

vulnerable at the mo.. i dont even feel like seeing anyone... and the urgent files i need to send out by tis morning still lay there on the front table... hati, soalnya hati... dan pengisian hati yang baik adalah dari Allah... kuatkan hati ku Ya Allah... permudahkan lah jalan ku kembali pada Mu... kupulangkan sepenuhnya cinta dan rindu yang hanya sebenarnya milik Mu...

wahai hati... bertahanla.. seperti selama ini kau bersama ku menempuh segalanya.. sejujurnya aku hanya ada kau dan DIA yang maha kaya...

adios,
xoxo

~~from amieheidi's.. sumthing to ponder

2008-08-19T10:05:00.005+08:00

Excerpts from amieheidi's blog, i dont even know her.. farina gave me her blog add which she stumbled upon surfing... since then, i frequented her blog.. and i get to know her on the surface, she's from brunei, studying in medicine or sumthing related to it, and what keeps me reading are the facts that she was once a "mini-skirt-wearer-cum-flirter" who now realized the beauty of wearing hijab and being a muslimah... in search of inner peace of mind and soul i am, i find her blog like an oasis... thanks to her... and may you learn sumthing out of it too...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Muslimah are like pearls not roses

~~ Muslimahs are not roses, which show off their beauty to everybody, unguarded, every bee can take a sip of its nectar, and yet, wilt after being fertilized, but muslimahs are pearls, whose beauty is preserved and taken care of, guarded by the shells of the oyster.
After all, bidadari in syurga are likened to pearls in surah Al-Waqiah: 22-23.

“Dan (di dalam syurga itu) ada bidadari-bidadari yang matanya cantik, laksana mutiara yang tersimpan baik” - Al-Waqiah: 22-23

Would you rather be similar to the bidadari, who are guarded, and whose beauty are hidden, or be similar to jahilliyah women who displays their beauty for everyone to look at them?

This is why, it is necessary, to be protected like a pearl, nestled deep within the shells of the oyster, rather than be a rose, unguarded, and can wilt anytime. ~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
am i a pearl or a rose??
wud i rather be a pearl or a rose??

roses are tempting, aren't they? but they are a sight too common nowadays, and the price only hike up seasonally.. but pearls, just by the fact that original pearls are hard to find makes it priceless... tapi ada pearls yang man-made from plastics.. maybe that is what i am now, a plastic pearl... fake,pretentious... ouch... wuu hurts..

cakap banyak tak guna, you claimed you have a brain.. use it azhe, wisely...

adios,

xoxo

melayankan mata yang ngantuk...

2008-08-18T14:14:00.004+08:00

mata berat 5kg setengah hari neh...

mondays.. always...like...this....

eheheehe...

last weekend, a few of my friends get married.. congratulations to all of you, shafi+ujang, rozi+faizul... august is definitely the month to get married, heheheee and im expecting a lot of newborns around april next year maybe??

eheheeh, my sis and akak ipar are preggies too, one week apart from each other and already in their 2 months... tambah la lagi bilangan anak2 sedare mok ude yang cun... kan aiman?

aizril biasa tak layan aku sngat except bila dia nak sumthing je, sebab aku pernah nak titiskan sos cili dalam mata dia,ahahahahahahaha.... talking bout creeters!!

tengok aiman ngan jiha (anak sedara am) bukan maen lagi lentok2 baek amek gamba... sabo man, kasik aa mok ude kawin ngan pak cik dia dulu..

hari ini juga, one of my gud fren patah hati.. cintanya ditolak, but if you asked me, the one who loses is the girl.. she doesnt know what she's missing.. am not taking sides but i can see how sincere he is, biarlaaa.. orang tu tengah di atas puncak dunia.. the world is her's for today.. let's see how long "today" will last... as for you ma fren, move on, will you.. take your heart and leave... she just doesnt fit anywhere in it

am having gud time with both of my housemates, okah n okid are doing fine!! bought a new larger cage for them, new type of canned food, having pets is time consuming!! phew...
anyhow, it makes me less selfish and not being so self-centered... gud for building characaters..

abang is leaving for kl this evening,, nak ikut.. but dont think he wud even like the idea, sigh..

to adrian, ko bosan..aku juga bosan.. mari membakar opes, so sume orang kelam kabut dan kite tak bosan lagi.. sebab sebok kena maki..

oleh itu, ko buat la apa patut nyah oiii... aku dah tak tau apa nak pkir lagi.

adios,
xoxo

DO NOT PLAY WITH YOUR FOOD!!

2008-08-15T17:43:00.006+08:00

its common to hear "jangan main ngan makanan, makan jangan main2, etc.." from the elders when we were small kids, maybe that time we dont even know why, the logic behind it..
but now, after being the elders ourselves.. some of us just still dont get it

i stumbled upon a picture of a "kinky" cake in a mutual friend's blog today, and i am deeply frustrated.. honestly...

what on earth where they thinking that persuade them to make that kind of cake?? the sight of it is soooo sickening!!!

what fun that is to make a cake that looks like sumone with "oversized" sexual organs, or decorated with sexual organs pictures?? HOW LOW DO YOU WANT PEOPLE TO ACTUALLY SEE YOU!!!

i didnt get the joke, and i dont think i ever will.... im not an angel myself, i sinned a lot.. i neglected a lot too.. but please, food is very basic in life, kenapa dengan rezeki yang ALLAH bagi awak dapat makan awak buat mainan macam tu? cant you at least have respect for the food??
setiap apa awak makan tu, rezeki tuhan bagi untuk awak, kenapa serendah itu awak hargai pemberian DIA???

from the size of the cake and the details on it, i bet it must be costly... ye awak kaya, money means nothing, you can practically buy anything you ever wanted.. tapi kalau hal duniawi ni, tengokla orang yang lagi kurang dari kita... makanan awak buang2 buat main camtu, pikirlaa sket guna akal yang diberi, ada orang lain yang makan nye hanya seminggu sekali...

i know everyone is entitled to their own opinion, this is mine.. im sorry if i offended anyone, i wrote this for me, a reminder to myself, untuk sentiasa sedarkan aku supaya bersyukur dengan rezeki, supaya aku tak menganggap rezeki itu sesuatu yang sentiasa diperlekeh dan dihargai hanya bila ia dah ditarik...

masing2 suma dah besar, lu pikir sendri laaa....

adios, xoxo

aktiviti ujong minggu

2008-08-14T15:01:00.008+08:00

to show you how i kill weekends @ telok ramunia..

~konvoi, alot of it~bbq~beaches~makan2~kites flying~ beach soccer~sand castle~mandi lawut~croc's farm~muzeum tour~naek hilltop tengok yard yang kosong... heheheeee...~

i know, some of you might say..azhe tak tau bersyukur, maseh nak bosan2 lagi..
well, you might be true.... but then, i am human, and human are hard to please..

ehehehe, btw.. alhamdulillah.. GOD blessed me with PICTURESQUE sceneries everywhere and WONDERFUL and sewel friends...

~i~l~o~v~e~n~a~t~u~r~e

adios, xoxo

that's me, and my canary..

O.r.k.a.h & O.r.k.i.d REVEALED!!!

2008-08-14T10:49:00.002+08:00

ehehehee, meet my new babies...

>>> Orkah, male, kelabu itam
>>> Orkid, female, white w black spots
** the name is with silent "r" for easy pronounciation

dah lama tak bela kucen, dolu2 time sekola rendah.. tapi pun mak yang bela, i tau gentel je.. so when i received my double O's, macam tak reti sangat, kesian dia susah payah gigit friskies keras tu, later i realize kena soften it with milk for kitteh yang less than 3months.. ehehehe...

bear with me laa okah okid, you know i love u... (kena ikut pendekatan saikologi nak bela anak neh, :p)

adorable they are, my housemates..eventho dia duk cage tapi cage tu still kat dalam rumah la kan...

okah >>> loves to climb your shoulder and stay there, to sleep
okid >>> suka gigit kaki tanpa jemu
azhe >>> obsess with both o's
you >>> thanks for reading, hahahhaha...

me,okah,okid ~~~) one happy family @ sg.kapal!!!!

adios, xoxo

O.r.k.a.h & O.r.k.i.d

2008-08-14T09:19:00.003+08:00

who? ehehheee...

my new L.oV.e.

coming soon, sebab aku tak ada gamba nak diupload lagi..

stay tuned!!!

adios, xoxo

malam yang melemahkan semangat...

2008-08-05T12:10:00.003+08:00

i got the fright of my life last nite.. entering my house's bathroom after coming back from Kota with sayang... there it was, the biggest centipede i've ever seen live in my whole 26th years of living... well, maybe i've seen one of those at the zoo or exhibition elsewhere, but i really never ever have the slightest intention to see one creepy crawling my bathroom floor!!!!!!!

the size was about two fingers and it was about 15-20cm long with black-red colour (i am certainly not exaggerating!!) the sight of it just burst my internal organs and sending fiery red alarms to my brain to run away pronto..and for good, never to return ever again..

lucky for me, my xavier, the love of my life is still outside waiting for mus to fetch him, hearing me babbling like nuts calling for help, he soothe me and went after the enormous lipan.. he couldnt find it at first which caused me to half hysteric phase, he kept on searching an voila!! there it is, i was not there to witness it.. just cant bring myself altogether, but i kept a fake brave upfront, came into the kitchen, and watched.. how it wriggles, trying to free itself, i can still visualized it.. but i cannot stay for long, fear overwhelmed me again... up to now, i am still a little nervous, patah semangat aku nyah!!!!

he did managed to kill the centipede (sorry, centipede..but you're harmful) and took it with him in a blue plastic bag to be thrown way away from my house... but i haven't stopped crying (i didnt mentioned this earlier right..) yeah i cried throughout the event, and sobbing hard... sangat takut.. fear conquered me, and i was so nerve-wracked.. the tears juct kept coming, and the sobbed getting harder..

he tried his best to console me, thanks sayang... he told me im strong, i've been through a lot and this is just one of it... (me, town girl..living alone in kampung area, near "jungle") i didnt like staying here, i just dont feel belong.. with all species of the world of insects around me, shooting "Bugs Life" on their own, a much hectic version... its hard for me to get through.. and now this... when he left, i was still crying.. but a bit under control.. trying hard to get a grip on myself, i called home.. to abah of course, 26 years old calling abah to ngadu about a lipan in the bathroom.. i really feel like a small girl, and i am always abah's little girl...

abah's theraphy works like a charm.. i do feel a little brave, and hold onto it like it was my last breath, i entered the bathroom... (after almost an hour of effort to calm myself down) eyes wandering around, feet ready to sprang any moment.. i managed to complete my ablution and leave the bathroom steadily....

alhamdulillah.. i am still breathing untill now.. fear partially conquered, am building back my semangat.. pray for me my friend, i need all the pray i can get...
simple things it might be for you, one giant big step for me...

adios,
xoxo..

a new beginning

2008-08-04T13:56:00.004+08:00

hehee, its been so long since aku dah ada cite2 nak buat blog aku sendiri, tapi kebanyakan masanye aku tak carik masa..

jadik aku tak ada la blog sampai ke saat ni,,kenapa aku bleh ada masa plak sekarng, after all this years? mungkin sebab sekarng aku dah lebih kenal diri aku sendiri..

aku dah tak drama queen sangt lagi seperti dahulu..:)

my status will change by end of this week, so will my life i guess... a small step to establishing the realtionship i worship for almost 5 years... all those sweats, blood and tears... most substantially.. the laugh and priceless life experiences we shared.. i prayed hard that it will be according to plan smoother than silk...

one thing i hope wont change for good is the beautiful friendship i shared with my friends..they do know who they are very well.. and i do know they are proud to be one.. heheheeh... as time passess, we get to really know who are the real one who stays come turbulance or flash flood.. and i am deeply thankful for them who lent their shoulders every time i wept (countless time, trust me..) they know i will be there for them too..

for all my newly married friends, may god bless your newly built family eternally.. and do pray that mine will survive all those "dugaan sewaktu berdarah manis ini".. me being hot-headed when he is mr.super-cool.. not exactly a gud match to tell the truth.. but we enjoy each other's company so much even in all the fights we had, which is..sangat banyak kali..ahahhahah

i hope i can keep this blog this time for my own self.. having a gud way to channel my thots and feelings is gud for me now.. since im living alone and quite far from beloved family and friends.. so i wont end up bottling my enermous emotions into my so tiny heart..aahahahaha...

till then.. adios...xoxo..